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#1 |
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Warning: If you're easily offended, this might not be for you.
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/ Pretty hysterical stuff. |
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#2 |
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(410): You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpe$ is gone.
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#4 |
I <3 Huy
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(859): Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
(502): Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine? ROFL
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I'm not antisocial, I just think people are stupid. |
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#5 |
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#6 |
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(859): im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
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#7 |
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(714): OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
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#8 |
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(714): I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your sh!tty personality.
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#9 |
Dear Lord, Thank You.
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That is perfect. I think I said that. roffles
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#10 |
I'm nuts for the place
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"To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur |
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#11 |
Captain Cannoli
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(617): Oh sh!t, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
how do i get this girls number??
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"One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher. |
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#12 | ||
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#13 |
Will herf for food
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(843): I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
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“Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar;” Mark Twain |
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#14 | |
Mila smoked my cigar
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"If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.", Zino Davidoff |
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#15 |
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(603): I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
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#16 |
Captain Cannoli
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"One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher. |
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#17 |
not wrapped too tight....
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(614): I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
What Area Code is Greg's phone????
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Out of the 10Base-T, through the router,past the firewall, down the T-1, over the leased line, off the bridge, ....Nothing but .NET |
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#18 |
Will herf for food
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(603): Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
(1-603) Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
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“Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar;” Mark Twain |
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#20 |
I <3 Huy
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(212): so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
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__________________
I'm not antisocial, I just think people are stupid. |
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