I was talking to a stranger...

Blak Smyth · 02-23-2012, 03:59 PM

I received a few random texts from the wrong number, eventually I started to reply this is the conversation word for word (not really a joke but I found it funny):

Stranger: I cant come anymore so i wont be at the game
Stranger: I . you!
Stranger: guess whats my background?!
Stranger: Hi madison
Me: You have the wrong number
Stranger: well thats unfortunate because i have a really interesting story
Me: Okay let's hear it. Maybe I can make up a true story to rival yours.
Stranger: Who says my story isnt right?
Stranger: well you see everything is see on twitter is like **** you guys and i hate you. then skeye comes up to me today and she says why does madi hate me i didnt even do anything and since her and robert effed on the couch... that i was on too (it was wierd) and she was just done talking with hayden it was a mess just waiting to happen
Me: I am not interested in your story. It sounds like the plot of every teenage vampire movie out there.
Stranger: fine then is yours anymore interesting? i doubt it
Me: I ordered two African swallows, just waiting for them to clear customs. My goal is to train them to transport coconuts. I will tie a string around the coconut and have one swallow hold each end of the string. I fear that a coconut will be entirely too heavy for a single swallow.
Stranger: i've had that same problem and its not that hard to fix
Me: Hmmm I have pretty much run out of options. What was your strategy?
Stranger: You tie 4 swallows to the coconut so none of them get tired and if one of them die its ok because you have 3 more to deliver the coconut.
Me: Seems like overkill. Im not talking about regular swallows. Im talking about African swallows. They are far more reliable than our native swallows but also twice as expensive.
Stranger: simple do the same thing as my plan but you get money by selling someone you don't really like into human trafficing and you can get 1 million if you really try to someone that they want and boom you got coconut transporting swallows
Me: Human trafficking... Hmmm that just might work. I can lure somebody with waffles and then yank them from everything they know and subject them to a life of violence and disrespect to get my birds, ultimatley allowing me to transport coconuts.
Stranger: sounds pretty good to me and lure them with scones they work better than waffles.
Me: So you want some scones?

shilala · 02-23-2012, 04:03 PM

LOL. Scones.

Jefft72 · 02-23-2012, 04:09 PM

Awesome.

Emjaysmash · 02-23-2012, 04:53 PM

Lmao

02-23-2012, 05:20 PM

Fordman4ever · 02-23-2012, 05:21 PM

That's awesome.

GreekGodX · 02-23-2012, 05:22 PM

Stranger Danger!

Chainsaw13 · 02-23-2012, 06:34 PM

I'll see if I can find the conversation I had with an anon texter a while back. Reminds me of this.

Taki · 02-23-2012, 06:40 PM

Run b!tch RUN

mase · 02-23-2012, 06:45 PM

Funny

Skywalker · 02-24-2012, 01:30 AM

WTF?

sevans105 · 02-24-2012, 01:38 AM

Serious question...cuz it pertains to my business plan.

By "scone" do you mean the flat british muffin type thing or the fried dough with cinnamon sugar type thing. I would think the fried dough would be more popular because heck who doesn't like fried dough, right? but because they are fried they would be harder to keep fresh as bait.

Please help!

fencefixer · 02-24-2012, 01:43 AM

When strangers call I usually ask "hey.. whatcha wearing right now?". I lead this full blown conversation for a good hour which kinda turned into something like phone sex one time.. it was obvious she mistook me for her boyfriend.

At the end I said "SAY MY NAME *****" and she said "Ooooh Marshall!" I said "Nope, it's DC and you got the wrong number". She's like "oh shi........." and she hung up and I never heard from her again.

Hem · 02-24-2012, 01:54 AM

LoL that's some good stuff man

02-24-2012, 08:57 AM

.

kelmac07 · 02-24-2012, 09:38 AM

hammondc · 02-24-2012, 09:44 AM

Actually a good point about having 4 swallows....

sevans105 · 02-24-2012, 09:53 AM

Nobody wants to help me with my business plan??? seriously, what kind of scones?

Blak Smyth · 02-24-2012, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sevans105

Nobody wants to help me with my business plan??? seriously, what kind of scones?

smitty81 · 02-24-2012, 09:59 AM

This made my day. Thanks!

02-23-2012, 03:59 PM	#1
Blak Smyth Think Blue! Join Date: Jun 2011 First Name: SD Location: THE WOOD Posts: 8,486 Trading: (52)	I was talking to a stranger... I received a few random texts from the wrong number, eventually I started to reply this is the conversation word for word (not really a joke but I found it funny): Stranger: I cant come anymore so i wont be at the game Stranger: I . you! Stranger: guess whats my background?! Stranger: Hi madison Me: You have the wrong number Stranger: well thats unfortunate because i have a really interesting story Me: Okay let's hear it. Maybe I can make up a true story to rival yours. Stranger: Who says my story isnt right? Stranger: well you see everything is see on twitter is like ** you guys and i hate you. then skeye comes up to me today and she says why does madi hate me i didnt even do anything and since her and robert effed on the couch... that i was on too (it was wierd) and she was just done talking with hayden it was a mess just waiting to happen Me: I am not interested in your story. It sounds like the plot of every teenage vampire movie out there. Stranger: fine then is yours anymore interesting? i doubt it Me: I ordered two African swallows, just waiting for them to clear customs. My goal is to train them to transport coconuts. I will tie a string around the coconut and have one swallow hold each end of the string. I fear that a coconut will be entirely too heavy for a single swallow. Stranger: i've had that same problem and its not that hard to fix Me: Hmmm I have pretty much run out of options. What was your strategy? Stranger: You tie 4 swallows to the coconut so none of them get tired and if one of them die its ok because you have 3 more to deliver the coconut. Me: Seems like overkill. Im not talking about regular swallows. Im talking about African swallows. They are far more reliable than our native swallows but also twice as expensive. Stranger: simple do the same thing as my plan but you get money by selling someone you don't really like into human trafficing and you can get 1 million if you really try to someone that they want and boom you got coconut transporting swallows Me: Human trafficking... Hmmm that just might work. I can lure somebody with waffles and then yank them from everything they know and subject them to a life of violence and disrespect to get my birds, ultimatley allowing me to transport coconuts. Stranger: sounds pretty good to me and lure them with scones they work better than waffles. Me: So you want some scones? __________________ SUPPORT OUR TROOPS**

02-23-2012, 04:03 PM	#2
shilala Dear Lord, Thank You. Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Posts: 13,721 Trading: (252)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... LOL. Scones. __________________

02-23-2012, 04:09 PM	#3
Jefft72 Still Watching My Back Join Date: Oct 2011 First Name: Jeff Location: League City, TX Posts: 219 Trading: (2)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Awesome.

02-23-2012, 04:53 PM	#4
Emjaysmash The Hebrew Hammer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: M.J. Location: Milwaukee, WI Posts: 7,025 Trading: (76)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Lmao __________________

02-23-2012, 05:20 PM	#5
tengel78 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: I was talking to a stranger...

02-23-2012, 05:21 PM	#6
Fordman4ever Redneck driving a ricer!! Join Date: Dec 2010 First Name: Earl Location: A place too cold to smoke outside Posts: 2,508 Trading: (26)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... That's awesome. __________________

02-23-2012, 05:22 PM	#7
GreekGodX Opa!! Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Christos Location: 7 Line Posts: 4,894 Trading: (82)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Stranger Danger! __________________ "If I give a businessman 10,000 francs, what is that to him, he is rich. But if I give him a Cohiba cigar, that is style."-Hotel Rwanda

02-23-2012, 06:34 PM	#8
Chainsaw13 Møøse bites can be nasty Join Date: Jan 2010 First Name: Bob Location: The Enchanted Mitten Posts: 7,198 Trading: (96)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... I'll see if I can find the conversation I had with an anon texter a while back. Reminds me of this. __________________ My neighbor came by my house this morning at 2AM, pounding on the door. Good thing I was still up playing the drums.

02-23-2012, 06:40 PM	#9
Taki Welcome to the Layer Cake Join Date: Aug 2011 First Name: Taki Location: The Creek Posts: 2,271 Trading: (38)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Run b!tch RUN __________________

02-23-2012, 06:45 PM	#10
mase Undead Recruiter Join Date: Sep 2011 First Name: Kevin Location: The city that works....against you Posts: 845 Trading: (9)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Funny __________________

02-24-2012, 01:30 AM	#11
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... WTF? __________________ Smoke what you like!!!

02-24-2012, 01:38 AM	#12
sevans105 Alpha Zombie Wolf "Sceve" Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Scott Location: Southern Minnesota Posts: 1,786 Trading: (30)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Serious question...cuz it pertains to my business plan. By "scone" do you mean the flat british muffin type thing or the fried dough with cinnamon sugar type thing. I would think the fried dough would be more popular because heck who doesn't like fried dough, right? but because they are fried they would be harder to keep fresh as bait. Please help! __________________

02-24-2012, 01:43 AM	#13
fencefixer Feeling at Home Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 544 Trading: (7)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... When strangers call I usually ask "hey.. whatcha wearing right now?". I lead this full blown conversation for a good hour which kinda turned into something like phone sex one time.. it was obvious she mistook me for her boyfriend. At the end I said "SAY MY NAME *****" and she said "Ooooh Marshall!" I said "Nope, it's DC and you got the wrong number". She's like "oh shi........." and she hung up and I never heard from her again.

02-24-2012, 01:54 AM	#14
Hem Feeling at Home Join Date: Jan 2012 First Name: Bill Location: Tampa (Cigar City) Posts: 826 Trading: (13)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... LoL that's some good stuff man

02-24-2012, 08:57 AM	#15
LigaPrivadaT84 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: I was talking to a stranger... .

02-24-2012, 09:38 AM	#16
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

02-24-2012, 09:44 AM	#17
hammondc Moar Padrons! Join Date: Aug 2010 First Name: Chip Location: Senoia, GA Posts: 2,626 Trading: (17)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Actually a good point about having 4 swallows....

02-24-2012, 09:53 AM	#18
sevans105 Alpha Zombie Wolf "Sceve" Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Scott Location: Southern Minnesota Posts: 1,786 Trading: (30)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... Nobody wants to help me with my business plan??? seriously, what kind of scones? __________________

02-24-2012, 09:59 AM	#20
smitty81 Have My Own Room Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 1,640 Trading: (10)	Re: I was talking to a stranger... This made my day. Thanks!