Comment About Buy/Sell/Trade

[BlackDog]

What I'm about to post may be basic knowledge to you all, but came as a bit of an "Ah Ha!" moment to me. So please bear with me if this is completely self evident to everyone but me.

I recently engaged in a sale of smoking related merchandise on another board. The member there agreed to my price and PM'd me saying they'd mail payment. So I waited the customary 3 - 5 days, and didn't receive payment, so I waited several more days. I PM'd the person, but my PM went unanswered. Now almost 2 weeks had passed. I became miffed. After a few more days I PM'd the other person again, and said that if they didn't make payment ASAP I was going to relist the item.

Finally I received a PM from the buyer. Without going into detail, simply let me say that the person had a medical problem arise of a very serious nature. I felt rather like a heel after learning the facts. Of course it is possible this person is snowing me, but given the facts surrounding the situation, and the earnestness in which he made his apology, I can only say I believe him 100%.

Of course when we enter into an agreement to buy, sell, or trade an item here on CA or any other board, we should make every possible effort to fulfill the obligation in timely manner. But, if your rading partner all of a sudden "disappears," it just may be possible that something very bad has happened to them. No one plans for a heart attack, death of a spouse or child, debilitating car accident, etc. Remember that this is a hobby, and shouldn't be something to cause stress or anger in our lives.

I agree with you 100% I have seen that happen before, and it makes you feel like a jerk when you find out.

[md4958]

Well said.

I know it can be frustrating as the seller waiting for payment, but people do have lives outside of this forum that can sometimes interfere with everybodys plans. Thats life.

agreed on that one!

[FriskyDingo]

A friend of mine is dealing with a situation exactly like this right now... it's a nice reminder to all of us that life happens, including the bad.

indeed. this does happen. however, ive had the opposite happen to me where the buyer really did lie about a medical illness. not on a cigar forum, but another. sold someone a bass head, they didnt send payment for over a month, told me he was in and out of the hospital. turns out he just spent all of his money on drugs and sat in the house. little did he know i was buddies with his roommate.

[madurolover]

Sometimes "real life" does get in the way of things. Usually things just got hectic and the person wasn't online, etc. Now if you look and the person has been online (which means they can see your PM's and can respond) then you may have reason to question their sincerity.

[mikeyj23]

I completely agree that life happens and gets in the way.

I also believe that someone with integrity fulfills their obligations no matter what.

[Jay Hemingway]

it's really all about "communication".
if you are dealing with someone and they are not responding to your PM's or e-mails, even though you can plainly see that they have been online lurking around, then that's just B.S.
if they haven't responded or have not been online, than you may want to take a step back and try to stay calm.
zero communication is only excusable in extreme cases,IMHO.