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12-02-2010, 02:12 PM | #1 |
Dad Jokester Supreme
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Things you hear...
- besides "The check is in the mail" - that probably aren't true.
* (after giving directions) ...you can't miss it. * I never watch television except PBS. * The engine is supposed to make that noise. * I never inhaled. * Just ignore him -- he's never bitten anyone. * Don't worry, I can get another 40 miles when the gauge is on "empty." * It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing. * You get this one and I'll pay next time. * I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions. * I'll call you right back. * I'm from the government and I'm here to help. * Don't worry. * I don't need a nice ring when you ask me to marry you. * Almost any answer to the question, "Do these pants make my rear end look big?" * I will pay you back next week. * I only had one drink, officer. * I'll be there in 5 minutes. * No, your driver's license picture looks fine. * The dog ate my homework. * It tastes just like chicken. * This car is just like new. * Guaranteed to last a lifetime. * This will pay for itself the first time you use it. * We don't need to stop for directions. I know exactly where we are. * Congratulations! You've just won an all expense paid trip to the destination of your choice. Absolutely free! No strings attached.
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...So don't sit upon the shoreline and say you're satisfied, Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance that tide |