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Old 12-02-2010, 02:12 PM   #1
Steve
Dad Jokester Supreme
 
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Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Steve
Location: 17 R 435648 3354895
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Default Things you hear...

- besides "The check is in the mail" - that probably aren't true.

* (after giving directions) ...you can't miss it.

* I never watch television except PBS.

* The engine is supposed to make that noise.

* I never inhaled.

* Just ignore him -- he's never bitten anyone.

* Don't worry, I can get another 40 miles when the gauge is on "empty."

* It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing.

* You get this one and I'll pay next time.

* I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions.

* I'll call you right back.

* I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

* Don't worry.

* I don't need a nice ring when you ask me to marry you.

* Almost any answer to the question, "Do these pants make my rear end look big?"

* I will pay you back next week.

* I only had one drink, officer.

* I'll be there in 5 minutes.

* No, your driver's license picture looks fine.

* The dog ate my homework.

* It tastes just like chicken.

* This car is just like new.

* Guaranteed to last a lifetime.

* This will pay for itself the first time you use it.

* We don't need to stop for directions. I know exactly where we are.

* Congratulations! You've just won an all expense paid trip to the destination of your choice. Absolutely free! No strings attached.
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