The Masshole Castaway

smokin5 · 11-22-2009, 08:33 PM

One day a Masshole, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years, saw a speck on the horizon.
He thought to himself, "Surely, it's not a ship." As the speck got closer & closer, he ruled out even the possibilities of a small boat or raft.
Suddenly, there strode out from the surf a figure clad in a black wet suit. Tossing aside the scuba tanks and mask, stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman!
She walked up to the stunned Masshole and said to him, "Tell me, how long has it been since you had a good cigar?"
"Ten years", replied the amazed Masshole. With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof pocket on the left sleeve of her wet suit and pulled out a fresh cigar and lighter.
He took the cigar, slowly lit it, and took a long drag. "Gahd", he said, "that was so good! I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke could be!"
"And how long has it been since you've had any good whiskey?" asked the blonde.
Trembling, the Masshole answered, "Ten years."
Hearing that, the blonde reached over to her right sleeve, unzipped a pocket there, and removed a flask and handed it to him.
He opened the flask and took a long drink. "It's fantastic!!", he shouted.
The blonde then slowly started to unzip the long front of her wet suit. She looked at the trembling Masshole and asked, "And how long has it been since you played around?"
With tears in his eyes, the Masshole fell to his knees and sobbed, "Oh, my dear Lord! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too!"

MedicCook · 11-22-2009, 08:35 PM

G G · 11-22-2009, 08:36 PM

Haha. : tu

timo · 11-22-2009, 08:51 PM

dunng · 11-23-2009, 09:45 AM

Skywalker · 11-23-2009, 11:42 AM

That's funny... because it's about a Masshole!!!

Starscream · 11-23-2009, 07:13 PM

http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showpo...0&postcount=14

massphatness · 11-23-2009, 07:16 PM

We rarely have our priorities in order

11-23-2009, 07:17 PM

I thought jokes were supposed to be fiction.....

Subvet642 · 12-07-2009, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Resipsa

I thought jokes were supposed to be fiction.....

Gee, I always thought they were supposed to be funny, too. BTW, I'll bet he had a club and was just lookin' for the green.

bobarian · 12-07-2009, 12:07 PM

md4958 · 12-07-2009, 12:10 PM

A true Masshole would have told her to hold his drink while he tee'd off!

11-22-2009, 08:33 PM	#1
smokin5 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: On the Mountaintop - AZ Posts: 2,002 Trading: (69)	The Masshole Castaway One day a Masshole, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years, saw a speck on the horizon. He thought to himself, "Surely, it's not a ship." As the speck got closer & closer, he ruled out even the possibilities of a small boat or raft. Suddenly, there strode out from the surf a figure clad in a black wet suit. Tossing aside the scuba tanks and mask, stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman! She walked up to the stunned Masshole and said to him, "Tell me, how long has it been since you had a good cigar?" "Ten years", replied the amazed Masshole. With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof pocket on the left sleeve of her wet suit and pulled out a fresh cigar and lighter. He took the cigar, slowly lit it, and took a long drag. "Gahd", he said, "that was so good! I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke could be!" "And how long has it been since you've had any good whiskey?" asked the blonde. Trembling, the Masshole answered, "Ten years." Hearing that, the blonde reached over to her right sleeve, unzipped a pocket there, and removed a flask and handed it to him. He opened the flask and took a long drink. "It's fantastic!!", he shouted. The blonde then slowly started to unzip the long front of her wet suit. She looked at the trembling Masshole and asked, "And how long has it been since you played around?" With tears in his eyes, the Masshole fell to his knees and sobbed, "Oh, my dear Lord! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there too!" __________________ Pobody's Nerfect.

11-22-2009, 08:35 PM	#2
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: The Masshole Castaway __________________ 27 World Series Championship's "If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.", Zino Davidoff

11-22-2009, 08:36 PM	#3
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,730 Trading: (10)	Re: The Masshole Castaway Haha. : tu

11-22-2009, 08:51 PM	#4
timo Feeling at Home Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: MA Posts: 723 Trading: (0)	Re: The Masshole Castaway __________________ Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics

11-23-2009, 09:45 AM	#5
dunng MassHole Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: MassHole Posts: 4,719 Trading: (59)	Re: The Masshole Castaway __________________ MassHole Banter

11-23-2009, 11:42 AM	#6
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: The Masshole Castaway That's funny... because it's about a Masshole!!! __________________ Smoke what you like!!!

11-23-2009, 07:13 PM	#7
Starscream Knowhutimean, Vern? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andy Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA Posts: 10,237 Trading: (4)	Re: The Masshole Castaway http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showpo...0&postcount=14 __________________ Insert quote here.

11-23-2009, 07:16 PM	#8
massphatness Where's my buffaloooo ... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Vin Location: MassHolia Posts: 12,690 Trading: (206)	Re: The Masshole Castaway We rarely have our priorities in order __________________ *Help Support The Navy SEAL Foundation: HERE*

11-23-2009, 07:17 PM	#9
Resipsa Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Masshole Castaway I thought jokes were supposed to be fiction.....

12-07-2009, 12:07 PM	#11
bobarian Cranky Habanophile Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Wine Country Posts: 8,869 Trading: (51)	Re: The Masshole Castaway

12-07-2009, 12:10 PM	#12
md4958 Captain Cannoli Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Moe Location: Suffield, CT Posts: 5,712 Trading: (62)	Re: The Masshole Castaway A true Masshole would have told her to hold his drink while he tee'd off! __________________ "One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher.