BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever

MedicCook · 03-13-2009, 02:35 PM

I was always partial to Butthead's pick up line.

"Hey baby! I got a beer!"

Nabinger16 · 03-13-2009, 02:41 PM

This one always cracked me up.

Wanna come back to my house and do some Maths? You can add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply.

Commander Quan · 03-13-2009, 02:47 PM

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

GKitty · 03-13-2009, 02:50 PM

...

Whee · 03-13-2009, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GKitty

...

It's amazing we can even reproduce based on these, isn't it?

MedicCook · 03-13-2009, 03:04 PM

A wedding ring and pictures of kids also seems to work... so I have heard.

skullnrose · 03-13-2009, 03:10 PM

For the record I am not Fred Flintstone but I sure would love to make your Bedrock!

Hot buns... and I know this ain't no bakery

Sailkat · 03-13-2009, 07:40 PM

03-13-2009, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sailkat

OK sleepy, let's hear from a women what works.

macpappy · 03-13-2009, 09:20 PM

Who needs pickup lines?
Three weeks ago my son and I go out for a drink at a local bar. We sit down, light our cigars and 20 minutes later a women who claimed she was a professional barrel racer sat down next to me and tried to pick me up. She started by saying, "That cigar smells good..."

Last week, my son and I went to a different bar. Grabbed a table in the corner and a pitcher of beer. The table next to us has a really hot brunette with very nice tattoos covering parts of her body made visible by a very low cut crop top t-shirt. When her boyfriend leaves, she turns around, puts her hands on my leg and tells me she likes my cigar and my t-shirt (I was wearing a freaking t-shirt I bought at wally word, for gods sake).

It must have been the cigars....

CBI_2 · 03-13-2009, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Commander Quan

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

Dang! Supposed to be trying to pick her up not put her to sleep.

My wife says with all of these lines in this thread, it's a wonder anyone ever got any.

You may like: "The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name."

03-13-2009, 02:35 PM	#1
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever I was always partial to Butthead's pick up line. "Hey baby! I got a beer!"

03-13-2009, 02:41 PM	#2
Nabinger16 Drowning Ex Gorilla Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Trent Location: Indiana Posts: 292 Trading: (8)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever This one always cracked me up. Wanna come back to my house and do some Maths? You can add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply.

03-13-2009, 02:47 PM	#3
Commander Quan Feeling at Home Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Derrick Location: Canton, OH Posts: 966 Trading: (4)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

03-13-2009, 02:50 PM	#4
GKitty JAFO Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Crystal Location: Olathe, KS Posts: 1,938 Trading: (8)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever ... __________________ A lost SOTL wandering the weird landscape of domesticity.

03-13-2009, 03:04 PM	#6
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever A wedding ring and pictures of kids also seems to work... so I have heard.

03-13-2009, 03:10 PM	#7
skullnrose Ashes,ashes,all fall down Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Scott Posts: 799 Trading: (16)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever For the record I am not Fred Flintstone but I sure would love to make your Bedrock! Hot buns... and I know this ain't no bakery Last edited by skullnrose; 03-13-2009 at 03:12 PM. Reason: added

03-13-2009, 07:40 PM	#8
Sailkat Smooth sailing Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Kat Location: St. Clair Shores, MI Posts: 638 Trading: (5)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever __________________ "Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde

03-13-2009, 09:20 PM	#10
macpappy Rider on the storm. Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Slidell, LA Posts: 851 Trading: (0)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Who needs pickup lines? Three weeks ago my son and I go out for a drink at a local bar. We sit down, light our cigars and 20 minutes later a women who claimed she was a professional barrel racer sat down next to me and tried to pick me up. She started by saying, "That cigar smells good..." Last week, my son and I went to a different bar. Grabbed a table in the corner and a pitcher of beer. The table next to us has a really hot brunette with very nice tattoos covering parts of her body made visible by a very low cut crop top t-shirt. When her boyfriend leaves, she turns around, puts her hands on my leg and tells me she likes my cigar and my t-shirt (I was wearing a freaking t-shirt I bought at wally word, for gods sake). It must have been the cigars.... __________________ WARNING: I am a Southern White Male. I have a brain and I know how to use it.