Snoring Problems

CBI_2 · 11-07-2010, 08:06 PM

A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can???t sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. "Yeah, right," she says.

A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed!

Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and carefully ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly.

The next morning, the husband wakes up hung over. He stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and says, "Boy, I don't remember where we were or what we did, but, by God, we got first and second place."

kelmac07 · 11-07-2010, 08:10 PM

G G · 11-07-2010, 08:19 PM

markem · 11-07-2010, 08:20 PM

my ribbon is polka dot

GolfNut · 11-07-2010, 08:28 PM

Please don't tell my wife about this.

SmokeyJoe · 11-07-2010, 09:07 PM

Ribbon? My wife just uses thread.

Skywalker · 11-08-2010, 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyJoe

Ribbon? My wife just uses thread.

Just tuck it into your sock!!!

Commander Quan · 11-08-2010, 11:06 AM

The Scotsman

Bunker · 11-08-2010, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Commander Quan

The Scotsman

I was just thinking, the last time I heard that the guy was wearing a kilt

BTcigars · 11-08-2010, 12:49 PM

Absolutely great, thanks for sharing!!

RUNYYFan · 07-03-2014, 03:47 PM

Worth a bump to the top.

)

pektel · 07-03-2014, 04:07 PM

l

I needed a good laugh.

11-07-2010, 08:06 PM	#1
CBI_2 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: In my skin. Posts: 2,066 Trading: (0)	Snoring Problems A couple has a dog that snores. Annoyed because she can???t sleep, the wife goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. "Yeah, right," she says. A few minutes after going to bed, the dog begins snoring as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep. Muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed! Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him. So she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and carefully ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly. The next morning, the husband wakes up hung over. He stumbles into the bathroom. As he stands in front of the toilet, he glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and says, "Boy, I don't remember where we were or what we did, but, by God, we got first and second place." __________________ "The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff

11-07-2010, 08:10 PM	#2
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: Snoring Problems __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

11-07-2010, 08:19 PM	#3
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,730 Trading: (10)	Re: Snoring Problems

11-07-2010, 08:20 PM	#4
markem Bunion Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Mark Location: Second Star on the Right Posts: 22,625 Trading: (47)	Re: Snoring Problems my ribbon is polka dot __________________ I refuse to belong to any organization that would have me as a member. ~ Groucho Marx

11-07-2010, 08:28 PM	#5
GolfNut Back in the woodshop! Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Forrest Location: Living room Posts: 1,361 Trading: (38)	Re: Snoring Problems Please don't tell my wife about this.

11-07-2010, 09:07 PM	#6
SmokeyJoe Chief Wannastogie Lounge Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Joe Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 3,163 Trading: (28)	Re: Snoring Problems Ribbon? My wife just uses thread. __________________ "I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God..." ~ Charles H. Spurgeon, British Baptist preacher

11-08-2010, 11:06 AM	#8
Commander Quan Feeling at Home Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Derrick Location: Canton, OH Posts: 966 Trading: (4)	Re: Snoring Problems The Scotsman

11-08-2010, 12:49 PM	#10
BTcigars Adjusting to the Life Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Sacramento CA Posts: 486 Trading: (1)	Re: Snoring Problems Absolutely great, thanks for sharing!! __________________ Be sure to chek out my blog.

07-03-2014, 03:47 PM	#11
RUNYYFan Life, Liberty, Happiness Join Date: Feb 2010 First Name: Marc Location: Splitting time between Dayton, NJ and Needmore, PA Posts: 360 Trading: (0)	Re: Snoring Problems Worth a bump to the top. ) __________________ Marc Fear is the dark room in which negatives are developed. - Anon.

07-03-2014, 04:07 PM	#12
pektel I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Peter Location: Grand Rapids, MN Posts: 4,320 Trading: (28)	Re: Snoring Problems l I needed a good laugh. __________________ The problem is not the problem. The problem is your ATTITUDE about the problem.