Should I feel bad? mixed emotions...

massphatness · 09-29-2010, 11:20 AM

e - it's hard to tell from your posts, but did you include the wife in the decision to move your collection to a full-on display cabinet? If not, she may be taking it as a slap in the face that, despite her pleadings and protestations regarding this hobby, you're now rubbing her nose in it a bit with the tower humi.

e-man67 · 09-29-2010, 11:28 AM

I did let her know before I bought it and she seemed cool with it. I talked about building a walk-in (for me) and a wine celler (for her) for awhile...then I found this cabinet that I could not pass up. She knows me..I always go ape **** with hobbies..but most of those were always in the garage (motorcycles, cars). Not rubbing her nose in it (at least not intentionally).

HK3- · 09-29-2010, 11:31 AM

Give it time. It will pass.

neoflex · 09-29-2010, 11:39 AM

Well in that case it sounds like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If in your shoes I would probably just roll with it and wait for it to blow over. Woman are fickle creatures so we might as well not even try to understand how their minds work. Good luck. Hope it blows over sooner rather than later.

357 · 09-29-2010, 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by neoflex

Well in that case it sounds like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If in your shoes I would probably just roll with it and wait for it to blow over. Woman are fickle creatures so we might as well not even try to understand how their minds work. Good luck. Hope it blows over sooner rather than later.

Good advice. Probably the best course of action for the short term. Buy her some flowers too.

357 · 09-29-2010, 11:38 AM

If health concerns are her biggest thing, there are a ton of arguments that can be made in your favor. Statistically speaking the most dangerous thing we each do on a daily basis is get into our car and drive to/from work.

Yet it almost sounds like, to her, there is some sort of stigma attached to being a smoker (cigar or otherwise). Has she been to any herfs? It might change her view on cigar smokers and any stereotypes she can't shake. I believe most non-smokers would be surprised and impressed by the group of guys/gals who frequent our herfs. It is a great bunch from all walks of life.

My mom and step-dad were pretty taken aback when they found out I smoked cigars. Neither liked it and my mom felt very strange the first time she saw me smoke. Since then I have convinced my step-dad to come with me to a local B&M with a lounge and try a cigar. He now looks forward to those times we can sit, relax, smoke, and talk. He doesn't smoke on his own, or own any cigars/paraphernalia, but he looks forward to that opportunity. Heck, recently my mom told me he was telling my great uncle how cigars have brought he and I closer.

e-man67 · 09-29-2010, 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 357

Has she been to any herfs? It might change her view on cigar smokers and any stereotypes she can't shake. I believe most non-smokers would be surprised and impressed by the group of guys/gals who frequent our herfs. It is a great bunch from all walks of life.

No she hasn't been to any Herfs...the only one she has met that I smoke with mostly is Dan and you know what a jerk he is...

elderboy02 · 09-29-2010, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by e-man67

No she hasn't been to any Herfs...the only one she has met that I smoke with mostly is Dan and you know what a jerk he is...

I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not

Mugen910 · 09-29-2010, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elderboy02

I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not

just tell him you've been called worse by better...that's what I usually retort with.

elderboy02 · 09-29-2010, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by e-man67

No she hasn't been to any Herfs...the only one she has met that I smoke with mostly is Dan and you know what a jerk he is...

I've been called worse by better

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mugen910

just tell him you've been called worse by better...that's what I usually retort with.

Thanks Mr. Bao!

09-29-2010, 11:20 AM	#1
massphatness Where's my buffaloooo ... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Vin Location: MassHolia Posts: 12,690 Trading: (206)	Re: Should I feel bad? mixed emotions... e - it's hard to tell from your posts, but did you include the wife in the decision to move your collection to a full-on display cabinet? If not, she may be taking it as a slap in the face that, despite her pleadings and protestations regarding this hobby, you're now rubbing her nose in it a bit with the tower humi. __________________ *Help Support The Navy SEAL Foundation: HERE*

09-29-2010, 11:28 AM	#2
e-man67 Big Drunkin Monkey!! Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Eric Posts: 1,480 Trading: (29)	Re: Should I feel bad? mixed emotions... I did let her know before I bought it and she seemed cool with it. I talked about building a walk-in (for me) and a wine celler (for her) for awhile...then I found this cabinet that I could not pass up. She knows me..I always go ape **** with hobbies..but most of those were always in the garage (motorcycles, cars). Not rubbing her nose in it (at least not intentionally). __________________ Big hairy Ape chuggin whiskey by the barrel full..making ladies cry!

09-29-2010, 11:31 AM	#3
HK3- Cashmere Jungle Lord Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Boffa Location: The town so nice they named it twice Posts: 5,035 Trading: (48)	Re: Should I feel bad? mixed emotions... Give it time. It will pass.

09-29-2010, 11:39 AM	#4
neoflex I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Nov 2008 First Name: John Location: Monroe, NC Posts: 2,765 Trading: (32)	Re: Should I feel bad? mixed emotions... Well in that case it sounds like you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If in your shoes I would probably just roll with it and wait for it to blow over. Woman are fickle creatures so we might as well not even try to understand how their minds work. Good luck. Hope it blows over sooner rather than later. __________________

09-29-2010, 11:38 AM	#6
357 Will herf for food Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Mike Location: Home is where I park it Posts: 4,075 Trading: (9)	Re: Should I feel bad? mixed emotions... If health concerns are her biggest thing, there are a ton of arguments that can be made in your favor. Statistically speaking the most dangerous thing we each do on a daily basis is get into our car and drive to/from work. Yet it almost sounds like, to her, there is some sort of stigma attached to being a smoker (cigar or otherwise). Has she been to any herfs? It might change her view on cigar smokers and any stereotypes she can't shake. I believe most non-smokers would be surprised and impressed by the group of guys/gals who frequent our herfs. It is a great bunch from all walks of life. My mom and step-dad were pretty taken aback when they found out I smoked cigars. Neither liked it and my mom felt very strange the first time she saw me smoke. Since then I have convinced my step-dad to come with me to a local B&M with a lounge and try a cigar. He now looks forward to those times we can sit, relax, smoke, and talk. He doesn't smoke on his own, or own any cigars/paraphernalia, but he looks forward to that opportunity. Heck, recently my mom told me he was telling my great uncle how cigars have brought he and I closer. __________________ “Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar;” Mark Twain