Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 02-28-2017, 05:40 PM   #1
shark
Cigar Smokin' Patriot
 
shark's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
First Name: Ron
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,566
Trading: (0)
Bolivar Army (Served With Honor)
shark is a glorious beacon of lightshark is a glorious beacon of lightshark is a glorious beacon of lightshark is a glorious beacon of lightshark is a glorious beacon of lightshark is a glorious beacon of light
Default Married four times?

The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation.

"He's a funeral director," she answered.
"Interesting", the newsman thought.
He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.

She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus "ringmaster" when in her 40's, and a preacher when in her 60's, and now - in her 80's - a funeral director.
The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.

She smiled and explained, "I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go!"
__________________
Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery
None but ourselves can free our minds
shark is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 05:47 PM   #2
icehog3
Admiral Douchebag
 
icehog3's Avatar
15
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Tom
Location: Clermont, Kentucky
Posts: 71,305
Trading: (60)
HUpmann
icehog3 has disabled reputation
Default Re: Married four times?

Oy vey.
__________________


Thanks Dave, Julian, James, Kelly, Peter, Gerry, Dave, Mo, Frank, Týr and Mr. Mark!
icehog3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 05:59 PM   #3
dijit
Have My Own Room
 
dijit's Avatar
5
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
First Name: Mike
Location: Brownsburg, Indiana
Posts: 2,186
Trading: (48)
Montecristo AirForce (Served With Honor)
dijit is just really nicedijit is just really nicedijit is just really nicedijit is just really nice
Default Re: Married four times?

This woman is my hero
__________________
Sporting goods raffle for a great cause. PM me for tickets.
dijit is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 06:22 PM   #4
heyferg
Feeling at Home
 
heyferg's Avatar
7
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
First Name: Larry aka Hollywood
Location: SoCal
Posts: 641
Trading: (6)
Bolivar
heyferg will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Married four times?

heyferg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 06:35 PM   #5
markem
Bunion
 
markem's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Mark
Location: Second Star on the Right
Posts: 22,622
Trading: (47)
HUpmann
markem has disabled reputation
Default Re: Married four times?

__________________
I refuse to belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
~ Groucho Marx
markem is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 06:41 PM   #6
CigarNut
F*ck Cancer!
 
CigarNut's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Michael
Location: Clermont, Florida
Posts: 18,042
Trading: (111)
RA
CigarNut has disabled reputation
Default Re: Married four times?

__________________
Need Beads? Need Five Finger Bags?

2 of 3 Requirements for use of the CA Rolodex: 100 posts/ 60 day membership/ participation in trade (trader rating). New members can be added at any time.
CigarNut is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 07:38 PM   #7
G G
BR549
 
G G's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Greg
Location: Taylor, FL.
Posts: 12,726
Trading: (10)
Bolivar
G G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant future
Default Re: Married four times?

good un!!!
G G is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 08:00 PM   #8
RUNYYFan
Life, Liberty, Happiness
 
RUNYYFan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
First Name: Marc
Location: Splitting time between Dayton, NJ and Needmore, PA
Posts: 360
Trading: (0)
Partagas
RUNYYFan will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Married four times?

__________________
Marc
Fear is the dark room in which negatives are developed. - Anon.
RUNYYFan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2017, 08:58 PM   #9
RevSmoke
Ain't Never Gonna Leave
 
RevSmoke's Avatar
5
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Todd
Location: Northcentral woods of Wisconsin
Posts: 6,849
Trading: (51)
HUpmann
RevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant futureRevSmoke has a brilliant future
Default Re: Married four times?

Quote:
Originally Posted by icehog3 View Post
Oy vey.
__________________
Todd__ "Smoke what you like, and enjoy it!"
RevSmoke is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2017, 03:59 AM   #10
Weelok
I'm nuts for the place
 
Weelok's Avatar
7
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
First Name: Dave
Location: Reno, NV
Posts: 4,088
Trading: (21)
RA
Weelok has a spectacular aura aboutWeelok has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: Married four times?

Funny and clever
__________________
Drink, pray, smoke, and work out.
Weelok is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2017, 08:23 AM   #11
Steve
Dad Jokester Supreme
 
Steve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Steve
Location: 17 R 435648 3354895
Posts: 7,715
Trading: (6)
HdM
Steve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud ofSteve has much to be proud of
Default Re: Married four times?

I approve!
__________________
...So don't sit upon the shoreline and say you're satisfied,
Choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance that tide
Steve is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-02-2017, 11:28 AM   #12
Dave128
Sexy Dave
 
Dave128's Avatar
3
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
First Name: Dave
Location: Voorheesville, NY
Posts: 3,922
Trading: (4)
Dave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really nice
Default Re: Married four times?

Nice!
__________________
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin
I "heart" Boobies and Beer!
Dave128 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:58 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.