Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-04-2009, 06:12 AM   #1
Poronico
Teh Forever Noob
 
Poronico's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
First Name: Jesse
Location: Bonney Lake, Wa
Posts: 868
Trading: (5)
Bolivar
Poronico will become famous soon enoughPoronico will become famous soon enough
Default Pick Up Lines...

OK people lets see what you got... Best and Worst pick up lines you have heard


"Excuse me... but does this smell like chloroform to you?"

"Hey Baby!, I'm Fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman in the world tonight"
__________________
Fellows, leave the tight pants to the ladies. If I can count the coins in your pocket, you better use them to call the tailor. "TMIMITW"
Poronico is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 07:30 AM   #2
TheTraveler
giggity giggitty
 
TheTraveler's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Jonathan
Location: Near a Walmart
Posts: 1,813
Trading: (12)
MarineCorps (Served With Honor)
TheTraveler has a spectacular aura aboutTheTraveler has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

I know it's unlikely that you still have your virginity, but can I at least see the box it came in?
__________________
"My life is my own."
TheTraveler is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 07:58 AM   #3
adampc22
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

get ya coat i have got a knife.

how much does a polar bear weigh ? enough to break the ice.

hay baby did u know your body is 75% water ? welll you are in luck as i am really thirsty.
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:05 AM   #4
adampc22
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

thos are the bad ones this is the good one .

If you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:07 AM   #5
e-man67
Big Drunkin Monkey!!
 
e-man67's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
First Name: Eric
Posts: 1,480
Trading: (29)
PL
e-man67 has a spectacular aura aboute-man67 has a spectacular aura aboute-man67 has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

"Let's go back to my place and see if it fits"
e-man67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:09 AM   #6
elderboy02
Lets Go Buckeyes!
 
elderboy02's Avatar
4
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dan
Location: Cincinnati, OH
Posts: 12,508
Trading: (133)
Bolivar
elderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud ofelderboy02 has much to be proud of
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheTraveler View Post
I know it's unlikely that you still have your virginity, but can I at least see the box it came in?
Quote:
Originally Posted by e-man67 View Post
"Let's go back to my place and see if it fits"
elderboy02 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:10 AM   #7
coastietech
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

"Lets go back to my place for pizza and sex..." "Aww come on who doesn't like pizza"
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 06:34 PM   #8
TonySmith
Feeling at Home
 
TonySmith's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 653
Trading: (1)
AirForce
TonySmith has disabled reputation
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Mouths are capable of such interesting things...less not waste it talking
TonySmith is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:12 PM   #9
CBI_2
Have My Own Room
 
CBI_2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Paul
Location: In my skin.
Posts: 2,066
Trading: (0)
CBI_2 is a jewel in the roughCBI_2 is a jewel in the roughCBI_2 is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Did you fart? Because you blew me away

I know I don't have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
__________________
"The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff
CBI_2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:37 PM   #10
kzm007
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

-Walk up to a girl, check her out, shaking your head-

Damn...all those curves, and me with no brakes
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 08:42 PM   #11
skullnrose
Ashes,ashes,all fall down
 
skullnrose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Scott
Posts: 799
Trading: (16)
HUpmann
skullnrose is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

For the record I am not Fred Flintstone but I sure would love to make your Bedrock.
__________________
skullnrose is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 09:12 PM   #12
wavescrashing
Unofficial CA Boli Ho
 
wavescrashing's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Mike
Location: An island?
Posts: 509
Trading: (19)
Bolivar MarineCorps (Active)
wavescrashing has disabled reputation
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

"Let's go halvesies on a bastard"
wavescrashing is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2009, 09:27 PM   #13
SilverFox
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?


If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.


Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my mind all night.
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 07:50 AM   #14
adampc22
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Quote:
Originally Posted by kzm007 View Post
-Walk up to a girl, check her out, shaking your head-

Damn...all those curves, and me with no brakes
man that is the best line ever
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 08:24 AM   #15
perogee
Still Watching My Back
 
perogee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
First Name: Robert
Location: Kananaskis
Posts: 213
Trading: (7)
perogee is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

I can read braille....
with my tongue
__________________
Evolving Leafer
perogee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 09:31 AM   #16
The EVP
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Walk up to the girl and say, "Excuse me, but did it hurt?" It'll probably go something like this:

"Excuse me, but did it hurt?"
"Huh? What?"
"I need to know. Did it hurt?"
"Did what hurt?"
"The fall from Heaven"

"I'm a man of few words. Wanna f**K?"
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 09:40 AM   #17
DoctorBJ
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Quote:
Originally Posted by wavescrashing View Post
"Let's go halvesies on a bastard"


"Nice shoes, Wanna F*ck?
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 09:40 AM   #18
DoctorBJ
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

do you have a mirror in your pants? Cuz I can see myself in them.
  Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2009, 01:39 PM   #19
safariguy
There's one. Set for stun
 
safariguy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
First Name: Ryan
Location: Michigan
Posts: 336
Trading: (7)
LGC
safariguy will become famous soon enoughsafariguy will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

"I got a boat."
safariguy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2009, 08:34 AM   #20
PeteSB75
Have My Own Room
 
PeteSB75's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Pete
Location: CT
Posts: 1,674
Trading: (18)
Montecristo
PeteSB75 will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Pick Up Lines...

Quote:
Originally Posted by safariguy View Post
"I got a boat."
Almost as good as "Wanna go for a ride in my Porsche?"
__________________
Formerly Malik23
PeteSB75 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:16 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.