Kids Are Quick

Genetic Defect · 05-07-2009, 10:52 AM

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS: Maria.

____________________________________

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

_______________________________________

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

_________________________________

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

___________________________________

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher

karmaz00 · 05-07-2009, 11:17 AM

lol good one

lightning9191 · 05-07-2009, 11:17 AM

05-07-2009, 11:21 AM

man that glen is a witty little git lol

WildBlueSooner · 05-07-2009, 05:23 PM

Some of these are classic...I like the dog composition one!

Boss Hogg · 05-07-2009, 06:39 PM

These were pretty cute

05-07-2009, 07:12 PM

Kids say the darnest things!

MedicCook · 05-07-2009, 10:21 PM

Some good ones in there.

skullnrose · 05-07-2009, 10:36 PM

Pretty funny ! You gotta love kids.

M1903A1 · 05-07-2009, 10:46 PM

I should forward those to my mom, the retired teacher.

wshan · 05-11-2009, 12:00 AM

One of my employees is getting ready to start teaching..I hope she doesn't get any students like that in her classes.

G G · 05-11-2009, 09:19 PM

Funny.

05-07-2009, 10:52 AM	#1
Genetic Defect difetosso Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Perry Location: An elevator Posts: 5,202 Trading: (5)	Kids Are Quick TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America . MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. ____________________________________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No, that's wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. ____________________________________________ TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O. __________________________________ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. _______________________________________ TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.' MILLIE: I is.. TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.' MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.' _________________________________ TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand. ______________________________________ TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook. ______________________________ TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his? CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog. ___________________________________ TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? HAROLD: A teacher __________________ I'm an outcast riding into town alone I got wanderlust branded deeper than the bone

05-07-2009, 11:17 AM	#2
karmaz00 Habanos Join Date: Dec 2008 First Name: Jason Location: victoria Posts: 1,855 Trading: (1)	Re: Kids Are Quick lol good one __________________ Habanos Collector Since 2003

05-07-2009, 11:17 AM	#3
lightning9191 I think I'm normal... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Kevin Posts: 1,007 Trading: (8)	Re: Kids Are Quick __________________ I eat gummy bears by tearing them limb from limb and eating their heads last.

05-07-2009, 11:21 AM	#4
adampc22 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Kids Are Quick man that glen is a witty little git lol

05-07-2009, 05:23 PM	#5
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: Kids Are Quick Some of these are classic...I like the dog composition one! __________________ "To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur

05-07-2009, 06:39 PM	#6
Boss Hogg Adjusting to the Life Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Curt Location: Hazzard County Posts: 288 Trading: (3)	Re: Kids Are Quick These were pretty cute

05-07-2009, 07:12 PM	#7
BMTA Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Kids Are Quick Kids say the darnest things!

05-07-2009, 10:21 PM	#8
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: Kids Are Quick Some good ones in there. __________________ 27 World Series Championship's "If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.", Zino Davidoff

05-07-2009, 10:36 PM	#9
skullnrose Ashes,ashes,all fall down Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Scott Posts: 799 Trading: (16)	Re: Kids Are Quick Pretty funny ! You gotta love kids.

05-07-2009, 10:46 PM	#10
M1903A1 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: 1060 W. Addison Posts: 1,573 Trading: (4)	Re: Kids Are Quick I should forward those to my mom, the retired teacher. __________________ "It's the cigars that bring us together, but it's the people that cause us to stay."

05-11-2009, 12:00 AM	#11
wshan Still Watching My Back Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Wei Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 57 Trading: (0)	Re: Kids Are Quick One of my employees is getting ready to start teaching..I hope she doesn't get any students like that in her classes.

05-11-2009, 09:19 PM	#12
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,726 Trading: (10)	Re: Kids Are Quick Funny.