BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever

03-13-2009, 02:02 PM

Okay, so I'm old & married but I thought us senior citizens could lend a hand & help out the younger BOTL's with some of our best pick-up lines.

So I'll go first:

"Hey, there's a party in your shoes and your pants are invited to come on down!"

Look, it got me married & expecting a kid didn't it? Okay, not that one but you know, I'm full of 'em.

Mugen910 · 03-13-2009, 02:02 PM

Me: Did it hurt?!?!?
Her: Huh?
Me: When you fell from heaven!

If I said you have an awesome body...would you hold it against me?

If we went alone to the woods and I made a move would you tell anyone?

Are your pants made of mirrors? I can see myself in them.

Does you face hurt? Cuz it's killing me! (not really a pickup line)

Me: You are mean!!!
Her: Why?
Me: I can already see you breaking my heart!

massphatness · 03-13-2009, 02:11 PM

Me: It's a good thing Bao has a girlfriend.

Mugen910 · 03-13-2009, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by massphatness

Me: It's a good thing Bao has a girlfriend.

true!!! I'd still be a virgin like Mr. Reindeer..

03-13-2009, 02:18 PM

From the AWESOME T.V. show "Millionaire Matchmaker"....something along the lines of:

Guy: "Hi, you know, not to brag or anything, but I've got a LOT of money. Do you like to go shopping? Because I like to pamper a woman and take her shopping and give her the enjoyment that I receive being in her company. And some guys really mind if it seems you're after their money. I don't. You don't have to do anything like cooking or cleaning, you can just spend my money. And I have a lot of it."

Girl: "But I like to cook and clean."

Guy: "Oh, well, you don't have to, is all I'm saying."

Ok, now youngins...I'm not suggesting you use this line. No, definitely don't use this line.

03-13-2009, 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mugen910

true!!! I'd still be a virgin like Mr. Reindeer..

Okay, it's true. And Mean D is the father of our child, I guess.

Mugen910 · 03-13-2009, 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrreindeer

Okay, it's true. And Mean D is the father of our child, I guess.

that poor poor child...didn't even have a chance at a good looks then..

You must be a speeding ticket...because you got FINE written all over you!!

Nabinger16 · 03-13-2009, 02:13 PM

If you were a screen door, I would slam you all night long!

You must be a General, cause you're making my privates stand at attention!

MedicCook · 03-13-2009, 02:35 PM

I was always partial to Butthead's pick up line.

"Hey baby! I got a beer!"

Nabinger16 · 03-13-2009, 02:41 PM

This one always cracked me up.

Wanna come back to my house and do some Maths? You can add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply.

Commander Quan · 03-13-2009, 02:47 PM

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

GKitty · 03-13-2009, 02:50 PM

...

CBI_2 · 03-13-2009, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Commander Quan

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

Dang! Supposed to be trying to pick her up not put her to sleep.

My wife says with all of these lines in this thread, it's a wonder anyone ever got any.

You may like: "The only thing your eyes haven't told me is your name."

karmaz00 · 03-13-2009, 03:19 PM

some good ones

tunes · 03-13-2009, 03:34 PM

Using your index finger to call her over say; I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

and in honor of the up coming holiday - I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some?

WildBlueSooner · 03-13-2009, 03:58 PM

- Your Dad must be a farmer..cause you have some great melons!
-Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one.
-I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
-If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? [No] Well, I don't, so let's go.
-Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some?
- Oh, you're a bird watcher. [Pull out your dong] Well, would you take this for a swallow?

HK3- · 03-13-2009, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildBlueSooner

- Your Dad must be a farmer..cause you have some great melons!
-Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one.
-I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
-If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? [No] Well, I don't, so let's go.
-Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some?
- Oh, you're a bird watcher. [Pull out your dong] Well, would you take this for a swallow?

That's sweet! I'm still laughing my ass off!

03-13-2009, 04:16 PM

Hey you're taller than I am, wanna ****?

That worked for me once. Seriously.

03-13-2009, 06:44 PM

Do you work at subway??? because you just gave me a footlong!!!

i’m blind, can you hold my stick and show me where to go?

Do u work for Cingular? Cuz you’re raising my bar.

GreekGodX · 03-13-2009, 08:03 PM

Walk up to a woman, check the label of her shirt. "Ahah, just as I thought, MADE IN HEAVEN"!

Hey baby your ass looks like a keg, how bout you let me tap that!

GUY: *make sound like an ambulance
Girl: What is that noise?
GUY: It's the ambulance coming to pick me up because you took my breath away.

Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.

Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.

And my all time favorite.
I only have 3 months to live..

03-13-2009, 02:02 PM	#1
mrreindeer Guest Posts: n/a	BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Okay, so I'm old & married but I thought us senior citizens could lend a hand & help out the younger BOTL's with some of our best pick-up lines. So I'll go first: "Hey, there's a party in your shoes and your pants are invited to come on down!" Look, it got me married & expecting a kid didn't it? Okay, not that one but you know, I'm full of 'em.

03-13-2009, 02:02 PM	#2
Mugen910 I <3 Huy Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Location Location: First Name Posts: 8,387 Trading: (106)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Me: Did it hurt?!?!? Her: Huh? Me: When you fell from heaven! If I said you have an awesome body...would you hold it against me? If we went alone to the woods and I made a move would you tell anyone? Are your pants made of mirrors? I can see myself in them. Does you face hurt? Cuz it's killing me! (not really a pickup line) Me: You are mean!!! Her: Why? Me: I can already see you breaking my heart! __________________ I'm not antisocial, I just think people are stupid.

03-13-2009, 02:11 PM	#3
massphatness Where's my buffaloooo ... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Vin Location: MassHolia Posts: 12,690 Trading: (206)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Me: It's a good thing Bao has a girlfriend. __________________ *Help Support The Navy SEAL Foundation: HERE*

03-13-2009, 02:18 PM	#5
mrreindeer Guest Posts: n/a	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever From the AWESOME T.V. show "Millionaire Matchmaker"....something along the lines of: Guy: "Hi, you know, not to brag or anything, but I've got a LOT of money. Do you like to go shopping? Because I like to pamper a woman and take her shopping and give her the enjoyment that I receive being in her company. And some guys really mind if it seems you're after their money. I don't. You don't have to do anything like cooking or cleaning, you can just spend my money. And I have a lot of it." Girl: "But I like to cook and clean." Guy: "Oh, well, you don't have to, is all I'm saying." Ok, now youngins...I'm not suggesting you use this line. No, definitely don't use this line.

03-13-2009, 02:13 PM	#8
Nabinger16 Drowning Ex Gorilla Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Trent Location: Indiana Posts: 292 Trading: (8)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever If you were a screen door, I would slam you all night long! You must be a General, cause you're making my privates stand at attention!

03-13-2009, 02:35 PM	#9
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever I was always partial to Butthead's pick up line. "Hey baby! I got a beer!"

03-13-2009, 02:41 PM	#10
Nabinger16 Drowning Ex Gorilla Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Trent Location: Indiana Posts: 292 Trading: (8)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever This one always cracked me up. Wanna come back to my house and do some Maths? You can add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply.

03-13-2009, 02:47 PM	#11
Commander Quan Feeling at Home Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Derrick Location: Canton, OH Posts: 966 Trading: (4)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really we'll, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going.

03-13-2009, 02:50 PM	#12
GKitty JAFO Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Crystal Location: Olathe, KS Posts: 1,938 Trading: (8)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever ... __________________ A lost SOTL wandering the weird landscape of domesticity.

03-13-2009, 03:19 PM	#14
karmaz00 Habanos Join Date: Dec 2008 First Name: Jason Location: victoria Posts: 1,855 Trading: (1)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever some good ones __________________ Habanos Collector Since 2003

03-13-2009, 03:34 PM	#15
tunes Still Watching My Back Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Bruce Location: East of the Mississippi Posts: 220 Trading: (3)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Using your index finger to call her over say; I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand. and in honor of the up coming holiday - I'm Irish. Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some? __________________ What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?

03-13-2009, 03:58 PM	#16
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever - Your Dad must be a farmer..cause you have some great melons! -Hey, you wanna do a 68? You go down on me, and I'll owe you one. -I lost my virginity. Can I have yours? -If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? [No] Well, I don't, so let's go. -Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some? - Oh, you're a bird watcher. [Pull out your dong] Well, would you take this for a swallow? __________________ "To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur

03-13-2009, 04:16 PM	#18
MithShrike Guest Posts: n/a	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Hey you're taller than I am, wanna ****? That worked for me once. Seriously.

03-13-2009, 06:44 PM	#19
Cigary Guest Posts: n/a	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Do you work at subway??? because you just gave me a footlong!!! i’m blind, can you hold my stick and show me where to go? Do u work for Cingular? Cuz you’re raising my bar.

03-13-2009, 08:03 PM	#20
GreekGodX Opa!! Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Christos Location: 7 Line Posts: 4,893 Trading: (82)	Re: BEST PICK-UP LINES....ever Walk up to a woman, check the label of her shirt. "Ahah, just as I thought, MADE IN HEAVEN"! Hey baby your ass looks like a keg, how bout you let me tap that! GUY: make sound like an ambulance Girl: What is that noise? GUY: It's the ambulance coming to pick me up because you took my breath away. Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!* Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. Do you know what'd look good on you? Me. And my all time favorite. I only have 3 months to live.. __________________ "If I give a businessman 10,000 francs, what is that to him, he is rich. But if I give him a Cohiba cigar, that is style."-Hotel Rwanda