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Old 07-02-2010, 09:32 PM   #41
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Default Re: Crushed.

With your recent struggles, this came to mind:

7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Corinthians 4:7-11 (New International Version)
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Old 07-02-2010, 09:39 PM   #42
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Default Re: Crushed.

The only advice I'll add is to listen to the above posters.

I went through a really rough breakup a few years ago. To make it worse, I was somewhere in the middle of a 9 month stint of living in a hotel in a fairly desolate area of upstate NY in winter.

Someone posted a thread on here (or CS, can't remember) similar to yours. He was venting his misery and asking whether or not to keep up the effort to get her back. I believe it was Tom who came through with the sage advice of letting things be and moving on. I figured that my situation was different, no one has experienced the love I did, etc etc etc. Turns out, that advice I read given by a guy I never met in person to another guy I never met in person was spot on. I finally let go, and ended up meeting the wonderful girl I'm now engaged to.

Enjoy life, experience life, and listen to the Adm DB.
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Old 07-02-2010, 10:19 PM   #43
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Default Re: Crushed.

Dude, your Dog too. I'm so sorry. Swing by Jersey before Tampa and we'll kick back, shoot the **** and have a smoke on me...
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Old 07-02-2010, 10:52 PM   #44
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Default Re: Crushed.

As they say: Sh*t happens. And it normally happens for a reason. Sometimes you never get over or at least never forget. I still think about a girl, we were going to get married, then broke up. I've written about her and wrote to her - but never mailed them.

Then I met my wife - and that was like 33 years ago. So it's tough, it sucks, but eventually you will find the one that was meant for you.

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Old 07-05-2010, 11:43 AM   #45
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Default Re: Crushed.

Thank you all for the support it helped me quite a bit.
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Old 07-05-2010, 11:50 AM   #46
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Default Re: Crushed.

Whatever we can do to help brother. No worries.
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Old 07-05-2010, 11:54 AM   #47
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Default Re: Crushed.

Ive actually got a date (per say) on Wednesday with a girl i've known for years. She is going to show me around campus and help me look for apartments.
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Old 07-05-2010, 01:45 PM   #48
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfgang View Post
Ive actually got a date (per say) on Wednesday with a girl i've known for years. She is going to show me around campus and help me look for apartments.
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Old 07-05-2010, 02:15 PM   #49
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Default Re: Crushed.

Thumbs up brother. Rule one... DONT MENTION THE EX!
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Old 07-05-2010, 03:51 PM   #50
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Default Re: Crushed.

I most certainly will not.
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Old 07-05-2010, 04:14 PM   #51
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfgang View Post
Ive actually got a date (per say) on Wednesday with a girl i've known for years. She is going to show me around campus and help me look for apartments.
things will get better, no matter how it feels. i have been in your shoes more then once. u are on the right path. you know that we are all here for you.
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Old 07-05-2010, 04:28 PM   #52
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Default Re: Crushed.

Thank you Rob. Time takes too long.
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Old 07-06-2010, 11:37 PM   #53
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Default Re: Crushed.

Actually that took less time than I thought, I have three dates lined up this week haha. The funny part is they all come to me. you guys are spot on.

One things for sure, Im not diving in untill I know how deep the water is.
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:00 AM   #54
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Default Re: Crushed.

When you first go out with her, tell her the four magic words that will keep your relationship on track, from the first date through the 50th wedding anniversary...Four magic words, that if lived by mutually by both parties, all will be well...

You can be replaced.
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:00 AM   #55
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfgang View Post
Actually that took less time than I thought, I have three dates lined up this week haha. The funny part is they all come to me. you guys are spot on.

One things for sure, Im not diving in untill I know how deep the water is.
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:01 AM   #56
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Virginia_Ghost View Post
When you first go out with her, tell her the four magic words that will keep your relationship on track, from the first date through the 50th wedding anniversary...Four magic words, that if lived by mutually by both parties, all will be well...

You can be replaced.
You are my hero.

Though you're a few years too late on the advice....
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Old 07-07-2010, 12:08 AM   #57
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Virginia_Ghost View Post
When you first go out with her, tell her the four magic words that will keep your relationship on track, from the first date through the 50th wedding anniversary...Four magic words, that if lived by mutually by both parties, all will be well...

You can be replaced.
HAHAH! You Sir (are making a scene) Bumpage

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Oh Jordan, you would.
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Old 07-07-2010, 01:23 AM   #58
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
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Oh Jordan, you would.
Hope you would too
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Old 07-07-2010, 06:24 AM   #59
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Default Re: Crushed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfgang View Post
Byt I feel like my fingers were still in the door when it slammed shut. I'm doing my best to "move on" but she was there for me through a lot of the medical adventures I Went through. She was a major support system for me and it seems as though my legs were kicked out from under me.
I can help with this one...
I divorced my wife five or six years ago over a long string of nasty sh!t she did. At first, I thought the things she did were about me. That she was trying to hurt me or get back at me for something she perceived I did.
It turned out that what she did was all about her, and I was just collateral damage. I just got caught in the propwash of her actions and it wasn't her intent. It wasn't about me, and that was a big relief.
I was married for a long time, we had a lot invested in our marriage, two kids, lots of stuff, and it took a good amount of time to get over it all. Mainly for her to get her head straightened out and start working in a good direction.
Now, we have a pretty decent working relationship. I still don't like her, but I didn't like her for lots of years when we were married, either.
What we did get from the divorce is a chance for both of us to be happy, and for us to live our lives out the way we want.
It's worked out fabulously, and I've fallen in love with a woman in a way I never thought possible.
It's already working out for you, too. Be patient. Enjoy life. Keep doing the next right thing and you'll be rewarded, guaranteed.
This verse helped me a lot, even though it's out of context, I've found it applies equally to love...
Luke 6:38 (New King James Version)

38 Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.”


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Old 07-07-2010, 07:07 AM   #60
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Default Re: Crushed.

if it wasn't for the bad ones, we would not appreciate the good ones.
if it wasn't for cloudy days, we would appreciate the sunny ones.
if you want to see true happiness, look into a smiling child's eyes
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