Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-16-2010, 04:50 PM   #1
markem
Bunion
 
markem's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Mark
Location: Second Star on the Right
Posts: 22,622
Trading: (47)
HUpmann
markem has disabled reputation
Default You might be Irish if

WHAT IT MEANS TO BE IN AN IRISH FAMILY


1) You will never play professional basketball.

2) You swear very well.

3) At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral
home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who
is a nun or uncle who's a priest..

4) You think you sing very well.

5) You have no idea how to make a long story short!

6) There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or
killing someone...

7) Many of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a
mortal sin.

8) You have never hit your head on a ceiling.

9) You spent a good portion of your childhood kneeling in prayer.

10) You're strangely poetic after a few beers.

11) Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past generations.

12) Many of your sisters and/or cousins are named Mary, Catherine or
Eileen .... and there is at least one member of your family with the
full name of Mary Catherine Eileen.

13) Someone in your family is very generous. It is more than likely you.

14) You may not know the words, but that doesn't stop you from singing..

15) You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start
talking.

16) You're not nearly as funny as you think you are ... but what you
lack in talent, you make up for in frequency.

17) There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last
keg party.

18) You are, or know someone, named Murph.

19) If you don't know Murph then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph
or Mac, then you know Sully. Then you probably know McMurphy

20) You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret.

21) You have Irish Alzheimer's... you forget everything but the grudges!

22) 'Irish Stew' is a euphemism for 'boiled leftovers.'

23) Your skin's ability to tan.... not so much. (Only in spots!)

24) Childhood remedies for the common cold often included some form of
whiskey.

25) There's no leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at
least 45 minutes.

26) At this very moment, you have at least two relatives who are not
speaking to each other. Not fighting, mind you, just not speaking to
each other.
__________________
I refuse to belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
~ Groucho Marx
markem is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 04:53 PM   #2
croatan
Missing Peter
 
croatan's Avatar
5
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: James
Location: la Vuelta Abajo
Posts: 3,727
Trading: (6)
HUpmann
croatan has disabled reputation
Default Re: You might be Irish if



Damn, that's true!
__________________
Fumo ergo sum.
croatan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 05:12 PM   #3
timo
Feeling at Home
 
timo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: MA
Posts: 723
Trading: (0)
timo will become famous soon enough
Default Re: You might be Irish if

My family to a T
__________________

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics
timo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 05:47 PM   #4
BigCat
My back is now unwatched.
 
BigCat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
First Name: Colin
Location: Metro Detroit
Posts: 723
Trading: (5)
BigCat will become famous soon enough
Default Re: You might be Irish if

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spitnchew View Post
My family to a T


I got a kick out of this!
__________________
"Now, I don't approve of dissipation, and I don't indulge in it either; but I haven't a particle of confidence in a man who has no redeeming petty vices." Mark Twain
BigCat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 05:50 PM   #5
tobii3
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: You might be Irish if

holy crap....this scares me!
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 05:53 PM   #6
GreekGodX
Opa!!
 
GreekGodX's Avatar
2
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
First Name: Christos
Location: 7 Line
Posts: 4,893
Trading: (82)
Montecristo
GreekGodX is a glorious beacon of lightGreekGodX is a glorious beacon of lightGreekGodX is a glorious beacon of lightGreekGodX is a glorious beacon of lightGreekGodX is a glorious beacon of lightGreekGodX is a glorious beacon of light
Default Re: You might be Irish if

Thank you for confirming I am definitely not Irish
__________________
"If I give a businessman 10,000 francs, what is that to him, he is rich. But if I give him a Cohiba cigar, that is style."-Hotel Rwanda
GreekGodX is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 05:58 PM   #7
icehog3
Admiral Douchebag
 
icehog3's Avatar
15
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Tom
Location: Clermont, Kentucky
Posts: 71,293
Trading: (60)
HUpmann
icehog3 has disabled reputation
Default Re: You might be Irish if

Quote:
Originally Posted by markem View Post
WHAT IT MEANS TO BE IN AN IRISH FAMILY


1) You will never play professional basketball.

2) You swear very well.

3) At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral
home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who
is a nun or uncle who's a priest..

5) You have no idea how to make a long story short!

6) There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or
killing someone...

7) Many of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a
mortal sin.

10) You're strangely poetic after a few beers.

11) Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past generations.

13) Someone in your family is very generous.

14) You may not know the words, but that doesn't stop you from singing..

15) You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start
talking.

16) You're not nearly as funny as you think you are ... but what you
lack in talent, you make up for in frequency.

17) There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last
keg party.

18) You are, or know someone, named Murph.

19) If you don't know Murph then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph
or Mac, then you know Sully. Then you probably know McMurphy

21) You have Irish Alzheimer's... you forget everything but the grudges!

22) 'Irish Stew' is a euphemism for 'boiled leftovers.'

23) Your skin's ability to tan.... not so much. (Only in spots!)

24) Childhood remedies for the common cold often included some form of
whiskey.

25) There's no leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at
least 45 minutes.

26) At this very moment, you have at least two relatives who are not
speaking to each other. Not fighting, mind you, just not speaking to
each other.
21 of 26...not bad.
__________________


Thanks Dave, Julian, James, Kelly, Peter, Gerry, Dave, Mo, Frank, Týr and Mr. Mark!
icehog3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 06:37 PM   #8
kelmac07
Resident Maduro Whore!!
 
kelmac07's Avatar
6
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
First Name: Mac
Location: Newport News, VA
Posts: 27,322
Trading: (218)
Bolivar Army (Retired)
kelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: You might be Irish if

24-26 here!!
__________________
Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"
kelmac07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 06:50 PM   #9
ashtonlady
The Lady is Here
 
ashtonlady's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Laura
Location: Seattle WA
Posts: 1,090
Trading: (8)
Navy (Served With Honor)
ashtonlady will become famous soon enoughashtonlady will become famous soon enough
Default Re: You might be Irish if

Now I know I am Scottish.
ashtonlady is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 07:19 PM   #10
Jbailey
Brewcifer
 
Jbailey's Avatar
3
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dave
Location: Madison, WI
Posts: 5,212
Trading: (17)
Jbailey has disabled reputation
Default Re: You might be Irish if

nice.
__________________
"Sent to spy on a Cuban talent show first stop- Havana au go-go."
Field Marshall Douche Bag.
Jbailey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 09:07 PM   #11
G G
BR549
 
G G's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Greg
Location: Taylor, FL.
Posts: 12,726
Trading: (10)
Bolivar
G G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant future
Default Re: You might be Irish if

I aint Irish (I don't think) but it sounds good to me.
G G is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-16-2010, 09:42 PM   #12
colinb913
Workin' at a Cigar Shop
 
colinb913's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
First Name: Colin
Location: Indiana
Posts: 540
Trading: (1)
Partagas
colinb913 is on a distinguished road
Default Re: You might be Irish if

That is defiantly me and my family.. But I do tan. Very well.
colinb913 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2010, 11:42 PM   #13
Skywalker
BABOTL
 
Skywalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dice
Location: Galaxy Far Far Away
Posts: 10,168
Trading: (18)
Partagas
Skywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud of
Default Re: You might be Irish if

That's my family... but not me!!!
__________________

Smoke what you like!!!
Skywalker is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:19 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.