Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-01-2010, 01:27 PM   #1
markem
Bunion
 
markem's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Mark
Location: Second Star on the Right
Posts: 22,621
Trading: (47)
HUpmann
markem has disabled reputation
Default redneck

You're An EXTREME Redneck When.....

1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.

3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

4. You think a woman who is out of your league bowls on a different night.

5. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

6. Someone in your family died right after saying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'

7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines. '

11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.

13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.

17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
__________________
I refuse to belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
~ Groucho Marx
markem is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 01:31 PM   #2
J0eybb
Feeling up at Home
 
J0eybb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
First Name: Joe
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 1,084
Trading: (5)
J0eybb will become famous soon enough
Default Re: redneck

#1 kills it. That's funny right dere.
J0eybb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 01:35 PM   #3
G G
BR549
 
G G's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Greg
Location: Taylor, FL.
Posts: 12,725
Trading: (10)
Bolivar
G G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant future
Default Re: redneck

G G is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 02:10 PM   #4
WildBlueSooner
I'm nuts for the place
 
WildBlueSooner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
First Name: James
Location: Lexington, KY
Posts: 3,322
Trading: (19)
AirForce (Served With Honor)
WildBlueSooner has a spectacular aura aboutWildBlueSooner has a spectacular aura aboutWildBlueSooner has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: redneck

My favorites:

9. Your junior prom offered day care.

10. You think the last words of the Star-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines. '

14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.

__________________
"To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur
WildBlueSooner is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:29 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.