40 years ago today

14holestogie · 12-17-2009, 09:49 AM

December 17, 1969. Funny how clear the memories of that day.

Sleeping over at a high school buddy's house and being sent on our way to school after a full breakfast prepared my his mom. She and my mom worked together waitressing and were great friends and were going to finalize their Christmas shopping later that day.

Took my usual walk off campus for my smoke break at lunch time (yeah, smoking already for 3 years at age 15) and walked past the Lutheran school nearby, where I stopped and chatted with my baby sister while she was on recess. I still see her face through the fence to this day.

Memory is a little fuzzier until I get home, I would suppose well after school's over. 3 mile walk rather than a bus ride. They frowned on smoking on the bus.

Once home, the phone rings and my step-dad gets a call and says there's been an accident. I remember trying to reassure him all the way on our 40 mile trip to the hospital that it can't be that bad or they would have told us.

I still remember the smell of the emergency room waiting area and just how all the furniture was arranged. The doctor comes in and quietly talks to my step-dad and takes him into another room. That's when I heard the wail, the wail I still hear today. It's then I realize how bad it can be.

While finishing up shopping, my mom's car was broad-sided by someone, in town, mind you, who was late for work and decided that speed limit and stop signs be damned, I need to get to work. There in the blink of an eye, my mom, my baby sister, and my buddy's mom all went to meet Jesus. 40 years young for the ladies, 9 years young for my sister.

Is it a wonder that Christmas presents don't quite have the luster for me they once had. It definitely puts the holidays in the proper perspective. It's about family and friends sharing their company with one another. The other stuff is just that, stuff.

I'll be smoking a good one later today with a tear in remembrance.
Smoke 'em if you've got 'em and tell the friends and family they're loved.

qwerty1500 · 12-17-2009, 10:31 AM

Memories can be a curse or a blessing. And, it's always more vivid when those memories involve the holiday season. Some will always hurt. All you can do sometimes is try to focus on the good memories. God bless you as you remember your Mom, baby sister and your friend's Mom.

longknocker · 12-17-2009, 10:38 AM

Thoughts & Prayers Sent For You & Your Family, Tim, During This Difficult Time. Thanks For Sharing, Brother.

G G · 12-17-2009, 10:40 AM

Love ya buddy, and will be praying for yall.

12-17-2009, 10:40 AM

Thoughts and prayers sent.

14holestogie · 12-17-2009, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

It's about family and friends sharing their company with one another. The other stuff is just that, stuff.

I'll be smoking a good one later today with a tear in remembrance.
Smoke 'em if you've got 'em and tell the friends and family they're loved.

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers, but this was what I was hoping was taken from the story.

It's all good.

...and I love you all.

Ashcan Bill · 12-17-2009, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

I'll be smoking a good one later today with a tear in remembrance.
Smoke 'em if you've got 'em and tell the friends and family they're loved.

Agreed.

I lost my dad much too soon on Dec. 12 years back. This time of year is always sort of bittersweet for me.

12-17-2009, 10:51 AM

Tim, thank you so much for sharing a very difficult and terrible thing with us and for reminding us what's really important. My thoughts go out to you and your family today.

AD720 · 12-17-2009, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

Thanks for the thoughts and prayers, but this was what I was hoping was taken from the story.

It's all good.

...and I love you all.

Tim, thanks for this story and the perspective. Things can happen really fast and sometimes we don't get a reminder of what's important so thank you for that as well.

Whee · 12-17-2009, 11:18 AM

...

Riff Raff · 12-17-2009, 11:18 AM

Tim, I most certainly will join you in your tribute to your mom, sister and friends mom! It is tragic. I hug my wife and son every day. Say the things that should be said today, right now.

I love you brother! May the peace and love of the Lord bless you all of your days!

Hendy · 12-17-2009, 11:30 AM

Tim, thinking about you and your family on this day. Tear in my eye and prayers in my heart.

God Bless and Merry Christmas.

SmokeyJoe · 12-17-2009, 11:37 AM

Tim... the strength and courage you had in dealing with this is remarkable.

I am sorry for this loss from so many years ago. I am thankful that you are here and part of this community. Enjoy your family this Christmas and know that there are folks here at CA who love and support you, bro.

Starscream · 12-17-2009, 11:41 AM

Thanks for the reminder, Tim. It's sad that things like this are what make us realize the important things in life. Thoughts and prayers sent to you and your family during this time. I know it's been a long time but you never "get over" a personal loss such as this.

68TriShield · 12-17-2009, 11:42 AM

Thank You Tim.

srduggins · 12-17-2009, 11:47 AM

Thanks for sharing this story. You have a remarkable writing ability and the point is well taken. God Bless you and yours this Christmas.

Coach Deg · 12-17-2009, 12:00 PM

This will be my second Christmas since cancer took my sister. Her and I always bought each other the best gifts. It's just not the same. I even see things in stores and thunk how much she would love it. I will expand my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. And I think I will sit on my porch after midnight mass and have a smoke on the porch alone with my memories of great Christmas past.

G G · 12-17-2009, 12:37 PM

Have lost quite a few family members in the last few years myself Tim, and will most certainly smoke a special cigar and remember them and think of you and your loss and all the other brothers and sisters here who have lost as well.

bobarian · 12-17-2009, 12:47 PM

A prayer goes out to you and your family.

ade06 · 12-17-2009, 01:00 PM

Thank you for sharing!

12-17-2009, 09:49 AM	#1
14holestogie Serial banter killer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tim Location: Clintonville, WI Posts: 4,341 Trading: (52)	40 years ago today December 17, 1969. Funny how clear the memories of that day. Sleeping over at a high school buddy's house and being sent on our way to school after a full breakfast prepared my his mom. She and my mom worked together waitressing and were great friends and were going to finalize their Christmas shopping later that day. Took my usual walk off campus for my smoke break at lunch time (yeah, smoking already for 3 years at age 15) and walked past the Lutheran school nearby, where I stopped and chatted with my baby sister while she was on recess. I still see her face through the fence to this day. Memory is a little fuzzier until I get home, I would suppose well after school's over. 3 mile walk rather than a bus ride. They frowned on smoking on the bus. Once home, the phone rings and my step-dad gets a call and says there's been an accident. I remember trying to reassure him all the way on our 40 mile trip to the hospital that it can't be that bad or they would have told us. I still remember the smell of the emergency room waiting area and just how all the furniture was arranged. The doctor comes in and quietly talks to my step-dad and takes him into another room. That's when I heard the wail, the wail I still hear today. It's then I realize how bad it can be. While finishing up shopping, my mom's car was broad-sided by someone, in town, mind you, who was late for work and decided that speed limit and stop signs be damned, I need to get to work. There in the blink of an eye, my mom, my baby sister, and my buddy's mom all went to meet Jesus. 40 years young for the ladies, 9 years young for my sister. Is it a wonder that Christmas presents don't quite have the luster for me they once had. It definitely puts the holidays in the proper perspective. It's about family and friends sharing their company with one another. The other stuff is just that, stuff. I'll be smoking a good one later today with a tear in remembrance. Smoke 'em if you've got 'em and tell the friends and family they're loved. __________________ *I loves me a Parti*

12-17-2009, 10:31 AM	#2
qwerty1500 Good thing I'm normal Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: One Particular Harbor Posts: 607 Trading: (0)	Re: 40 years ago today Memories can be a curse or a blessing. And, it's always more vivid when those memories involve the holiday season. Some will always hurt. All you can do sometimes is try to focus on the good memories. God bless you as you remember your Mom, baby sister and your friend's Mom.

12-17-2009, 10:38 AM	#3
longknocker Postwhore Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Mobile, Alabama Posts: 11,174 Trading: (82)	Re: 40 years ago today Thoughts & Prayers Sent For You & Your Family, Tim, During This Difficult Time. Thanks For Sharing, Brother.

12-17-2009, 10:40 AM	#4
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,730 Trading: (10)	Re: 40 years ago today Love ya buddy, and will be praying for yall.

12-17-2009, 10:40 AM	#5
Tombstone Guest Posts: n/a	Re: 40 years ago today Thoughts and prayers sent.

12-17-2009, 10:51 AM	#8
mrreindeer Guest Posts: n/a	Re: 40 years ago today Tim, thank you so much for sharing a very difficult and terrible thing with us and for reminding us what's really important. My thoughts go out to you and your family today.

12-17-2009, 11:18 AM	#10
Whee formerly illinoishoosier Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Sean Location: Bishopville, SC Posts: 3,591 Trading: (17)	Re: 40 years ago today ... __________________ "Maybe I'm wrong, when they tell me they're right…..naaaaahhhhhh, I'm an asshooooooleeee"--Denis Leary

12-17-2009, 11:18 AM	#11
Riff Raff Habitual Offender Join Date: Sep 2009 First Name: Bill Location: Stuttgart, Germany Posts: 370 Trading: (11)	Re: 40 years ago today Tim, I most certainly will join you in your tribute to your mom, sister and friends mom! It is tragic. I hug my wife and son every day. Say the things that should be said today, right now. I love you brother! May the peace and love of the Lord bless you all of your days! __________________ "I am a simple man and enjoy the simple things in life as long as those simple things are the very best." Winston Churchill

12-17-2009, 11:30 AM	#12
Hendy Running with Scissors Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Scott Location: Southeast Michigan Posts: 183 Trading: (18)	Re: 40 years ago today Tim, thinking about you and your family on this day. Tear in my eye and prayers in my heart. God Bless and Merry Christmas.

12-17-2009, 11:37 AM	#13
SmokeyJoe Chief Wannastogie Lounge Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Joe Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 3,163 Trading: (28)	Re: 40 years ago today Tim... the strength and courage you had in dealing with this is remarkable. I am sorry for this loss from so many years ago. I am thankful that you are here and part of this community. Enjoy your family this Christmas and know that there are folks here at CA who love and support you, bro. __________________ "I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God..." ~ Charles H. Spurgeon, British Baptist preacher

12-17-2009, 11:41 AM	#14
Starscream Knowhutimean, Vern? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andy Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA Posts: 10,237 Trading: (4)	Re: 40 years ago today Thanks for the reminder, Tim. It's sad that things like this are what make us realize the important things in life. Thoughts and prayers sent to you and your family during this time. I know it's been a long time but you never "get over" a personal loss such as this. __________________ Insert quote here.

12-17-2009, 11:42 AM	#15
68TriShield Got Torque? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dave Location: Maryland Posts: 7,194 Trading: (40)	Re: 40 years ago today Thank You Tim.

12-17-2009, 11:47 AM	#16
srduggins Feeling at Home Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: steve Location: So. Cal. No More Posts: 504 Trading: (37)	Re: 40 years ago today Thanks for sharing this story. You have a remarkable writing ability and the point is well taken. God Bless you and yours this Christmas.

12-17-2009, 12:00 PM	#17
Coach Deg C O W eieio. Join Date: May 2009 First Name: Mike Location: Hudson, FL Posts: 2,853 Trading: (59)	Re: 40 years ago today This will be my second Christmas since cancer took my sister. Her and I always bought each other the best gifts. It's just not the same. I even see things in stores and thunk how much she would love it. I will expand my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. And I think I will sit on my porch after midnight mass and have a smoke on the porch alone with my memories of great Christmas past.

12-17-2009, 12:37 PM	#18
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,730 Trading: (10)	Re: 40 years ago today Have lost quite a few family members in the last few years myself Tim, and will most certainly smoke a special cigar and remember them and think of you and your loss and all the other brothers and sisters here who have lost as well.

12-17-2009, 12:47 PM	#19
bobarian Cranky Habanophile Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Wine Country Posts: 8,869 Trading: (51)	Re: 40 years ago today A prayer goes out to you and your family.

12-17-2009, 01:00 PM	#20
ade06 Have My Own Room Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ade Location: Philadelphia Posts: 1,190 Trading: (24)	Re: 40 years ago today Thank you for sharing!