The Perfect Husband

Ogre · 01-29-2015, 08:20 PM

here are several men in the locker room of a private club after exercising. Suddenly a cell phone that was on one of the benches rings. A man picks it up and the following conversation ensues:

"Hello?"

"Honey, It's me."

"Sugar!"

"Are you at the club?"

"Yes."

"Great! I am at the mall 2 blocks from where you are. I saw a beautiful mink coat... It is absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?"

"What's the price?"

"Only $2,000.00"

"Well, OK, go ahead and get, if you like it that much..."

"Ahhh and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2015 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price ... and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..."

"What price did he quote you?"

"Only $90,000..."

"OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."

"Great!, before we hang up, something else..."

"What?"

"It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and I saw the house we had looked at last year ... it's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property..."

"How much are they asking?"

"Only $900,000... a magnificent price, and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..." "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $850,000. OK?"

"OK, sweetie... Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!"

"Bye... I do too..."

"The man hangs up, closes the phone's flap and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"

CigarNut · 01-29-2015, 09:04 PM

icehog3 · 01-29-2015, 09:12 PM

Perfect ending.

01-29-2015, 09:18 PM

Oh, man - Neil, your phone WAS at the gym after all!

Dave128 · 01-30-2015, 08:51 AM

That's awesome!

longknocker · 01-30-2015, 09:11 AM

shark · 02-28-2015, 05:13 PM

So they have that much to cover the asking price...What about closing cost, taxes, fees....

RUNYYFan · 03-02-2015, 10:03 AM

I haven't read/heard this one since the early '00's. Thank you.

czerbe · 03-02-2015, 03:13 PM

Can I PLEASE have my phone back!

01-29-2015, 08:20 PM	#1
Ogre **CENSORED** Join Date: Apr 2010 First Name: Larry Location: Central Florida Posts: 12,068 Trading: (46)	The Perfect Husband here are several men in the locker room of a private club after exercising. Suddenly a cell phone that was on one of the benches rings. A man picks it up and the following conversation ensues: "Hello?" "Honey, It's me." "Sugar!" "Are you at the club?" "Yes." "Great! I am at the mall 2 blocks from where you are. I saw a beautiful mink coat... It is absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?" "What's the price?" "Only $2,000.00" "Well, OK, go ahead and get, if you like it that much..." "Ahhh and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2015 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price ... and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..." "What price did he quote you?" "Only $90,000..." "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options." "Great!, before we hang up, something else..." "What?" "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and I saw the house we had looked at last year ... it's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property..." "How much are they asking?" "Only $900,000... a magnificent price, and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..." "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $850,000. OK?" "OK, sweetie... Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!" "Bye... I do too..." "The man hangs up, closes the phone's flap and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?" __________________

01-29-2015, 09:04 PM	#2
CigarNut Fck Cancer! Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Michael Location: Clermont, Florida Posts: 18,042 Trading: (111*)	Re: The Perfect Husband __________________ Need Beads? Need Five Finger Bags? 2 of 3 Requirements for use of the CA Rolodex: 100 posts/ 60 day membership/ participation in trade (trader rating). New members can be added at any time.

01-29-2015, 09:12 PM	#3
icehog3 Admiral Douchebag Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tom Location: Clermont, Kentucky Posts: 71,266 Trading: (60)	Re: The Perfect Husband Perfect ending. __________________ Thanks Dave, Julian, James, Kelly, Peter, Gerry, Dave, Mo, Frank, Týr and Mr. Mark!

01-29-2015, 09:18 PM	#4
badbriar Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Perfect Husband Oh, man - Neil, your phone WAS at the gym after all!

01-30-2015, 08:51 AM	#5
Dave128 Sexy Dave Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Dave Location: Voorheesville, NY Posts: 3,922 Trading: (4)	Re: The Perfect Husband That's awesome! __________________ "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin I "heart" Boobies and Beer!

01-30-2015, 09:11 AM	#6
longknocker Postwhore Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Mobile, Alabama Posts: 11,162 Trading: (82)	Re: The Perfect Husband

02-28-2015, 05:13 PM	#7
shark Cigar Smokin' Patriot Join Date: Sep 2009 First Name: Ron Location: Michigan Posts: 3,561 Trading: (0)	Re: The Perfect Husband So they have that much to cover the asking price...What about closing cost, taxes, fees.... __________________ Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery None but ourselves can free our minds

03-02-2015, 10:03 AM	#8
RUNYYFan Life, Liberty, Happiness Join Date: Feb 2010 First Name: Marc Location: Splitting time between Dayton, NJ and Needmore, PA Posts: 360 Trading: (0)	Re: The Perfect Husband I haven't read/heard this one since the early '00's. Thank you. __________________ Marc Fear is the dark room in which negatives are developed. - Anon.

03-02-2015, 03:13 PM	#9
czerbe Just a Traveling Man Join Date: Apr 2012 First Name: Corey Location: Reading Pa Posts: 1,309 Trading: (2)	Re: The Perfect Husband Can I PLEASE have my phone back! __________________ Live fast, hard, everyday like its your last.