Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-16-2012, 11:21 AM   #1
Bluetick
Still Watching My Back
 
Bluetick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 112
Trading: (0)
Bluetick is on a distinguished road
Default Who to marry?

A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three
likely candidates.. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to
see what they do with the money.

The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her
hair done, new makeup; buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely
for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for
him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts... She gets him a new set of
golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As
she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on
him because she loves him so much.

Again, the man is impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the
$5,000... She gives him back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a
joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because
she loves him so much.

Obviously, the man was impressed.

The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the
money he'd given her.

Then he married the one with the biggest boobs.
Men are like that, you know.
Bluetick is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 11:43 AM   #2
kelmac07
Resident Maduro Whore!!
 
kelmac07's Avatar
6
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
First Name: Mac
Location: Newport News, VA
Posts: 27,322
Trading: (218)
Bolivar Army (Retired)
kelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"
kelmac07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 11:45 AM   #3
Taki
Welcome to the Layer Cake
 
Taki's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
First Name: Taki
Location: The Creek
Posts: 2,271
Trading: (38)
HdM
Taki has disabled reputation
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
Taki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 11:58 AM   #4
pektel
I'm nuts for the place
 
pektel's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
First Name: Peter
Location: Grand Rapids, MN
Posts: 4,320
Trading: (28)
LGC
pektel is just really nicepektel is just really nicepektel is just really nicepektel is just really nicepektel is just really nice
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
The problem is not the problem. The problem is your ATTITUDE about the problem.
pektel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 12:09 PM   #5
Dave128
Sexy Dave
 
Dave128's Avatar
3
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
First Name: Dave
Location: Voorheesville, NY
Posts: 3,922
Trading: (4)
Dave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really niceDave128 is just really nice
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin
I "heart" Boobies and Beer!
Dave128 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 12:11 PM   #6
Ciro
Enjoying the Show!
 
Ciro's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 461
Trading: (11)
SLR
Ciro has disabled reputation
Default Re: Who to marry?

Ciro is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 12:26 PM   #7
MurphysLaw
Anything can go wrong
 
MurphysLaw's Avatar
2
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
First Name: Brian
Location: SoFlo
Posts: 2,823
Trading: (19)
Partagas
MurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really nice
Default Re: Who to marry?

MurphysLaw is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 01:13 PM   #8
CigarNut
F*ck Cancer!
 
CigarNut's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Michael
Location: Clermont, Florida
Posts: 18,042
Trading: (111)
RA
CigarNut has disabled reputation
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
Need Beads? Need Five Finger Bags?

2 of 3 Requirements for use of the CA Rolodex: 100 posts/ 60 day membership/ participation in trade (trader rating). New members can be added at any time.
CigarNut is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 01:37 PM   #9
Ogre
****CENSORED****
 
Ogre's Avatar
7
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
First Name: Larry
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 12,068
Trading: (46)
Montecristo
Ogre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant futureOgre has a brilliant future
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________
Ogre is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-16-2012, 10:22 PM   #10
Skywalker
BABOTL
 
Skywalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dice
Location: Galaxy Far Far Away
Posts: 10,168
Trading: (18)
Partagas
Skywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud of
Default Re: Who to marry?

__________________

Smoke what you like!!!
Skywalker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-17-2012, 11:59 AM   #11
Apoco
Nerd with social skills
 
Apoco's Avatar
4
 
Join Date: May 2010
First Name: Alex
Location: Chattanooga, TN
Posts: 1,286
Trading: (37)
Apoco is a jewel in the roughApoco is a jewel in the roughApoco is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: Who to marry?

Is this supposed to be funny? Read like a romantic modern-day love story to me


Posted via Mobile Device
Apoco is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:49 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.