Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-01-2011, 05:14 PM   #1
Darrell
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Poor Tom Smith!

The Best Story of the Year:

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express

praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the

podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband,

Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely

crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if

they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men
in the

congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have

experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went

on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the

doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they
were able

to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap
wire

around it to hold it in place." Again, the men in the congregation

cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible
surgery

performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank

the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with
time,

his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with
unified

relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had

something to say.

A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.

He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath.

"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
  Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2011, 05:19 PM   #2
kelmac07
Resident Maduro Whore!!
 
kelmac07's Avatar
6
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
First Name: Mac
Location: Newport News, VA
Posts: 27,322
Trading: (218)
Bolivar Army (Retired)
kelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond reputekelmac07 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Poor Tom Smith!

__________________
Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"
kelmac07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2011, 05:23 PM   #3
G G
BR549
 
G G's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Greg
Location: Taylor, FL.
Posts: 12,723
Trading: (10)
Bolivar
G G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant futureG G has a brilliant future
Default Re: Poor Tom Smith!

good un.
G G is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2011, 06:05 PM   #4
Skywalker
BABOTL
 
Skywalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dice
Location: Galaxy Far Far Away
Posts: 10,168
Trading: (18)
Partagas
Skywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud of
Default Re: Poor Tom Smith!

__________________

Smoke what you like!!!
Skywalker is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:42 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.