Military Humor

[Mugen910]

A U.S. Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist, badly injured and unconscious.
On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.

The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road.

I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Ted Kennedy is a fat, good-for-nothing, left wing liberal drunk who doesn't know how to drive.

So I said that Osama Bin Laden dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian! He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Nancy Pelosi!"

"And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."

[elderboy02]

I love it!

[rrplasencia]

f'ing funny!!!

[Texan in Mexico]

Funny one

[dunng]

[kydsid]

I liked that one. How about we keep this going with more military jokes?


Here is an oldie but goodie that all enlisted love.

After moving to a new base a little boy is told to go outside and play for awhile. Being new to base and having no friends he sits down outside his house. He notices a huge pile of sh!t and decides to build himself a toy soldier. As he is shaping it a young officer comes along and asks: "Son what exactly are you doing with that sh!t!" The little boy looks up and offers a salute and quickly responds, "Sir, I am building a non-com officer!". The officer immediately cracks up laughing and tells the boy to keep having fun. A while later a grizled old Sargeant Major comes walking down the path towards the boy. "Son I heard you are telling people you are building non-com officers out of sh!t". The little boy looks up, "Yes Sargeant Major, because I didn't have enough sh!t to build an officer!"

[G G]