Word Play -- A Contest, A Contest...

[Neuromancer]

As many of you may remember from our other home (where we swing through the treetops), I occasionally throw out a contest in hopes of keeping you lunatics busy thinking for more than the usual day or two it takes you to demolish my contests, so I'm gonna try again...this, of course, is not the only reason...I also suffer from CAD, TAD, and PAD, and often find my humi's a little too stuffed at times and I need to relieve the pressure before the sides burst...

In to the Gang of 11, that stalwart band of brothers (OTL), that founded CA just a scant 15 days ago, to wit, a contest...not too many rules either...

Rule #1: You must have at least 15 posts (for the 15 days) prior to the start of this contest.

Rule #2: Only one entry per person per 24 hour period.

Rule #3: No post editing (you're on your honor here).

Rule #4: No fair using Google! Find a dictionary, or ask your nearest AP student (an honor thing again).

Rule #5: No time on the board requirement as none of us is any older here than 15 days.

Here's how the contest will go:

I'll pose a sentence that needs translation into something more readable, for example:

Up the rivulet with insufficient means of propulsion.

You'll translate it into more conventional English, for example:

Up the creek without a paddle.

First guy (or gal) to get them all correct will win a selection of fine stogies (read: "dog rockets" ) from my overflowing humi's, most of which will have anywhere from one to three years aging on them.

And away we go...oh yeah, I forgot to mention there's 15 of them to translate too...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

1) All articles that coruscate with resplendence are not truly auriferous.

2) Male cadavers are incapable of yielding any testimony.

3) Individuals who make their abode in vitreous edifices would be advised to refrain from catapulting petrous projectiles.

4) It is fruitless to become lachrymose over precipitately departed lacteal fluid.

5) Eschew the implement of correction and vitiate the scion.

6) The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled saucepan does not reach 212 degrees Fahrenheit.

7) Sorting on the part of mendicants must be interdicted.

8) Freedom from incrustations of grime is contiguous to rectitude.

9) Where there are visible vapors having their provenance in ignited carbonaceous materials, there is conflagration.

10) Pulchritude possesses solely cutaneous profundity.

11) The writing implement is more potent than the claymore.

12) Eleemosynary deeds have their initial incidence intramurally.

13) Neophyte's serendipity.

14) The person presenting the ultimate cachinnation possesses thereby the optimal cachinnation.

15) Missiles of ligneous or quarried masses have the potential of fracturing osseous structure, but appellations will eternally remain innocuous.