Asking for the Father's Blessing?

E.J. · 01-01-2011, 01:31 PM

Not wanting to steal thunder or hi-jack one of the engagement threads, I wondered what the B/SOTL say?

I have been married twice and did not even think to discuss my pending engagement with the first FIL, but actually felt huge guilt about that when we told her parents the news. It was like I could see the "I'm losing my little girl" in his eyes and I knew right then that I should have discussed my intentions with him prior to asking.

It was not as if anything he would have said, would have changed the course of my actions(they loved me, so there was no worry, still do actually), but I knew after the fact, that in my mind, it would have been the right thing to do.

I did not make this mistake the second time. It was a phone conversation, which I felt was also a bit "half assed", but there was distance and that was the way it was going to be done. Actually did it seconds before I popped the question, but I felt better about doing it all the same....

Long story short, I hope the man that asks my daughter to spend her life with him, discusses that with me prior...& my son will know my expectations of him as well.....

Too traditional?

What did you do?

If you have been on the other side, stories one way or the other?

Thoughts from the women on this forum?

01-01-2011, 01:31 PM	#1
E.J. I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 3,218 Trading: (21)	Asking for the Father's Blessing? Not wanting to steal thunder or hi-jack one of the engagement threads, I wondered what the B/SOTL say? I have been married twice and did not even think to discuss my pending engagement with the first FIL, but actually felt huge guilt about that when we told her parents the news. It was like I could see the "I'm losing my little girl" in his eyes and I knew right then that I should have discussed my intentions with him prior to asking. It was not as if anything he would have said, would have changed the course of my actions(they loved me, so there was no worry, still do actually), but I knew after the fact, that *in my mind*, it would have been the right thing to do. I did not make this mistake the second time. It was a phone conversation, which I felt was also a bit "half assed", but there was distance and that was the way it was going to be done. Actually did it seconds before I popped the question, but I felt better about doing it all the same.... Long story short, I hope the man that asks my daughter to spend her life with him, discusses that with me prior...& my son will know my expectations of him as well..... Too traditional? What did you do? If you have been on the other side, stories one way or the other? Thoughts from the women on this forum?