Farm Humor

[BlackDog]

8 year old Jonny lives on the family farm with his parents. One particular morning, he is annoyed as all heck that he has to get up so early and feed the animals. On his way into the chicken coup, a hen gets under his foot and trips him up. He gives the chicken a swift kick to get it out of the way. When he enters the pig pen with a bucket of slop, the pigs rush in around him and knock him down into the mud. Getting up, filthy, he grabs the now empty slop bucket and bops one of the pigs on the head with it. When he tries to open the cattle gate to toss out some fresh hay, the cows are all so anxious for their food that they are crowding around and won't let Jonny open the gate. After smacking several of the cattle on their heads to get them to move, he's finally able to get in and finish his feeding routine.

Once he gets cleaned up back in the house, he heads downstairs for breakfast, where his mother has set out a bowl of dry cereal for him. Puzzled, Jonny asks his mom "Hey, what's this? I usually have milk in my cereal and a side of bacon and eggs. What's going on?"

His mother explains "I saw you kick that chicken this morning; For that, you won't be having eggs for a week. I also saw you hit one of our pigs with the slop bucket; For that, you won't get any bacon for a week as well. And when you went out to feed the cows, I saw you hitting them instead of being patient and trying to move them calmly; For that, no milk for two weeks."

Grumbling, Jonny starts picking at his dry cereal. Just then, his father is coming down the stairs for his breakfast when the cat runs between his legs, nearly causing him fall down the remaining 7 stairs. Aggravated, he winds back and kicks the cat out of the way. Jonny looks up from his cereal and asks his mom "Do you want to tell him, or should I?"