Why are you tired?

mikeyj23 · 06-07-2009, 02:16 PM

Got this a while ago in an email - figures are obviously 100% accurate.

Tired?

For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax buildup, poor blood or anything else I could think of.

But now I found out the real reason:

I'm tired because I'm overworked.

Here's why:

The population of this country is 273 million.
140 million are retired
That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 48 million to do the work.

Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 19 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.

Take from that total the 14.8 million people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me.

And there you are,

sitting on your ass,

at your computer,

on Cigar Asylum,

reading jokes.

Nice. Real nice.

Barteur · 06-07-2009, 02:22 PM

06-07-2009, 03:30 PM

Very good, I like it!!

kelmac07 · 06-07-2009, 03:45 PM

That's us!!

LasciviousXXX · 06-07-2009, 03:52 PM

But but but.... I work for the Govt.

I'm supposed to be sitting on my ass letting you work

dunng · 06-07-2009, 04:17 PM

06-07-2009, 05:39 PM

Don't look at me! I'm one of the 2.8 million Armed Forces!!

CBI_2 · 06-08-2009, 05:02 AM

06-08-2009, 12:57 PM

Hey, don't look at me, I'm......

damn!

Skywalker · 06-08-2009, 01:03 PM

Get back to work Mikey!!!

icantbejon · 06-08-2009, 01:25 PM

Funny **** right here

zmancbr · 06-08-2009, 01:26 PM

Nice... that was damn funny!

skullnrose · 06-08-2009, 01:36 PM

Good one!

marge796 · 06-08-2009, 02:12 PM

Top notch!

Chris.....

rack04 · 06-08-2009, 02:23 PM

I can justify my time reading that joke because I'm getting paid by the government to do work their not capable of doing.

G G · 06-08-2009, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LasciviousXXX

But but but.... I work for the Govt.

I'm supposed to be sitting on my ass letting you work

Me too.

rack04 · 06-08-2009, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ggainey

Me too.

Hence the post count?

G G · 06-08-2009, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rack04

Hence the post count?

What's your point.

06-07-2009, 02:16 PM	#1
mikeyj23 Feeling at Home Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Michael Location: Texas Posts: 635 Trading: (10)	Why are you tired? Got this a while ago in an email - figures are obviously 100% accurate. Tired? For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax buildup, poor blood or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked. Here's why: The population of this country is 273 million. 140 million are retired That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school. Which leaves 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 19 million to do the work. 2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Bin-Laden. Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work. Take from that total the 14.8 million people who work for state and city governments. And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work. At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals. Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work. Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me. And there you are, sitting on your ass, at your computer, on Cigar Asylum, reading jokes. Nice. Real nice.

06-07-2009, 02:22 PM	#2
Barteur Golf is life Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Eric Location: Montreal Posts: 724 Trading: (18)	Re: Why are you tired? __________________

06-07-2009, 03:30 PM	#3
Waynegro1 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Why are you tired? Very good, I like it!!

06-07-2009, 03:45 PM	#4
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: Why are you tired? That's us!!

06-07-2009, 03:52 PM	#5
LasciviousXXX Team of 11...Always Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Týr Location: New Orleans Posts: 4,579 Trading: (8)	Re: Why are you tired? But but but.... I work for the Govt. I'm supposed to be sitting on my ass letting you work

06-07-2009, 04:17 PM	#6
dunng MassHole Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: MassHole Posts: 4,719 Trading: (59)	Re: Why are you tired? __________________ MassHole Banter

06-07-2009, 05:39 PM	#7
tobii3 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Why are you tired? Don't look at me! I'm one of the 2.8 million Armed Forces!!

06-08-2009, 05:02 AM	#8
CBI_2 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: In my skin. Posts: 2,066 Trading: (0)	Re: Why are you tired? __________________ "The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff

06-08-2009, 12:57 PM	#9
LordOfWu Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Why are you tired? Hey, don't look at me, I'm...... damn!

06-08-2009, 01:03 PM	#10
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: Why are you tired? Get back to work Mikey!!! __________________ Smoke what you like!!!

06-08-2009, 01:25 PM	#11
icantbejon Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Jon Location: Chester, VA Posts: 1,219 Trading: (10)	Re: Why are you tired? Funny **** right here __________________ "Learn to pay attention. Life is hard.....it's even more challenging when you're stupid."

06-08-2009, 01:26 PM	#12
zmancbr CERTIFIED THREAD KILLER!! Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Zach Location: Color Red Posts: 1,692 Trading: (41)	Re: Why are you tired? Nice... that was damn funny!

06-08-2009, 01:36 PM	#13
skullnrose Ashes,ashes,all fall down Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Scott Posts: 799 Trading: (16)	Re: Why are you tired? Good one! __________________

06-08-2009, 02:12 PM	#14
marge796 It Just Doesn’t Matter!!! Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Chris Location: Topeka KS Posts: 1,624 Trading: (28)	Re: Why are you tired? Top notch! Chris..... __________________ “Don’t talk to me about naval tradition. It’s nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.” -Sir Winston Churchill

06-08-2009, 02:23 PM	#15
rack04 Lebowski Urban Achiever Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Justin Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 1,023 Trading: (20)	Re: Why are you tired? I can justify my time reading that joke because I'm getting paid by the government to do work their not capable of doing. __________________ "Why don't you put them in your secret compartment" - 12stones (Ricky)