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01-27-2009, 09:29 AM | #1 |
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Classroom questions
The old standard:
President Bush goes to an elementary school to talk about the war. After his talk, he offers to answer questions. One little boy puts up his hand and the president asks him his name. "I'm Billy, sir." "And what's your question, Billy?" "I have three questions, sir. Why did the US invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden?" Just then the bell rings for recess. Bush announces that they'll continue after recess. When they return, Bush asks, "OK, where were we? Question time! Who has a question?" Another little boy raises his hand. The president asks his name. "I'm Steve, sir." "And what's your question, Steve?" "I have five questions, sir. Why did the US invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Whatever happened to Osama Bin Laden? Why did the recess bell go off twenty minutes early? And what the heck happened to Billy?" Revised version: Jon buys a cigar website to make money. After he puts up the new site, he says that things will be pretty much the same as on the old site. On the old site, people used to ask questions and get answers. One day, a little boy makes a post. "I'm Billy. What ever happend to Lowland Louie?" Jon says "He was replaced by a puffer fish." Then another little boy starts to say something else about Louie, but no sooner do the words post in the thread, than they are edited out and the thread is closed. Another little boy makes a post. "I'm Dan. Has anyone ever seen 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest'?" Just then the thread closes for new posts. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Steve. I have three questions. What happened to Lowland Louie? Where did all older members go? And why can't we talk about the movie 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' ? " Just then the thread closes for new posts. Jon announces that the discussion is over. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Tom. I have four questions. What happened to Lowland Louie? Where did all older members go? Why can't we talk about the movie 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' ? And what happened to Steve's thread?" Just then the thread closes for new posts. Jon announces that the discussion is over. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Al. I have five questions. What happened to Lowland Louie? Where did all older members go? Why can't we talk about the movie 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' ? What happened to Steve's thread? And what the heck happened to Tom?" Just then the thread closes for new posts. Jon announces that the discussion is over. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Dustin. I have six questions. What happened to Lowland Louie? Where did all older members go? Why can't we talk about the movie 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' ? What happened to Steve's thread? What the heck happened to Tom and Al? And how can we keep it from happening to us?" Just then the thread closes for new posts, without so much as an announcement. It moves to a strange new "Drama" forum. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Peter. I only have two questions. Why didn't anyone answer Dustin? And what are the answers to his questions?" After a short while the thread closes for new posts, without so much as an announcement. It moves to the "Drama" forum. A bit later, another little boy makes a post. "I'm Adam. I only have two questions. What are the answers to Dustin's questions? And aren't we allowed to ask questions any more?" Just then the thread closes for new posts, and Jon says "Come out in the hall with me if you want to ask questions." |
01-27-2009, 02:05 PM | #7 |
Juan of 11
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Re: Classroom questions
Julians wit could dry out the wettest basement.
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Communities Not Commodities. Punctuation challenged, but trying. Proud winner of phase 1 of the Weight loss contest |
01-27-2009, 02:09 PM | #8 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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Re: Classroom questions
That is just AWESOME.
Can we add it to the Awesome Content thread? |
01-27-2009, 02:11 PM | #9 |
Captain Cannoli
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Re: Classroom questions
I've heard the revised version before
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"One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher. |
01-27-2009, 02:12 PM | #10 |
MassHole
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Re: Classroom questions
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MassHole Banter |
01-27-2009, 02:38 PM | #12 |
Guest
Posts: n/a
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Re: Classroom questions
OUTSTANDING!!!! |
01-27-2009, 02:43 PM | #16 |
Gravy Boat Winnah.
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Pete
Location: my attorney has advised against giving this information to insane people
Posts: 5,326
Trading: (22)
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Re: Classroom questions
Will Dustins questions ever be answered?
Will Peter be happy if they are? Will Millie finally find out who humped her leg in the dark? Will Tom end up on the back of a Stoli bottle? Will Steve find out where the Cuckoos Nest is? Will Adam be asked for "his papers, Please"? Will Jon ever find the nuts to act like a human being, learning from his mistakes? Tune in tomorrow, fans, same Puffy time, Same Puffy channel!!!! |
01-27-2009, 02:53 PM | #19 |
Palmetto State Herf Crew!
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Re: Classroom questions
I just noticed that the word 'asylum' is on the list of banned phrases at puff.com
The forum automatically deletes it... even if you're talking about the band Soul Asylum, it comes up as Soul ****** Sorry if it's been brought up already...
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Everyday I'm shufflin... |
01-27-2009, 02:56 PM | #20 |
Palmetto State Herf Crew!
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Re: Classroom questions
It has...
Follow the link.
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Everyday I'm shufflin... |