Poor Tom Smith!

03-01-2011, 05:14 PM

The Best Story of the Year:

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express

praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the

podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband,

Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely

crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if

they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men
in the

congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have

experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went

on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the

doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they
were able

to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap
wire

around it to hold it in place." Again, the men in the congregation

cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible
surgery

performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank

the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with
time,

his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with
unified

relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had

something to say.

A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.

He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath.

"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."

kelmac07 · 03-01-2011, 05:19 PM

G G · 03-01-2011, 05:23 PM

good un.

Skywalker · 03-01-2011, 06:05 PM

03-01-2011, 05:14 PM	#1
Darrell Guest Posts: n/a	Poor Tom Smith! The Best Story of the Year: The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place." Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom. "Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath. "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."

03-01-2011, 05:19 PM	#2
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: Poor Tom Smith! __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

03-01-2011, 05:23 PM	#3
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,725 Trading: (10)	Re: Poor Tom Smith! good un.

03-01-2011, 06:05 PM	#4
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: Poor Tom Smith! __________________ Smoke what you like!!!