Not Quite Limericks

[cmitch]

In the nights of old and the sky was blue,
through the dark alleys the sh!t wagons flew.
A bump was hit and a cry was heard,
a man was killed by a flying turd.

______

She offered her honor;
He honored her offer;
And all night long
He was on her and off her!

______

Here lay the grave of Micheal O'Day
Who died maintaining his right of way.
His right was clear, his will was strong
But he is just as dead,
As if he were wrong

______

Humpty Dumpty Sat On The Wall
Humpty Dumpty Had A Great Fall
All The Kings Horses And All The Kings Men
Could Not Put Humpty Dumpty Together Again
So They Made a HUGE A$$ OMELETTE!

[icehog3]

Some purty good ones there.

[SvilleKid]

There was a lady who triplets begat
Nat, Pat and Tat
It was fun breeding
But trouble feeding
Cause she didn't have a tit for Tat.

[cmitch]

There was once a magician named Magoo,
Who practiced a trick that was new.
He reached in his hat,
Where the rabbit had shat,
And came out with a hand full of doo.

________

A nun from east Amsterdam,
Had a caboose as tight as a clam.
A lass slipped in his thumb,
That surely was dumb,
Now he's gotten in one helluva jam.

[icehog3]

Originally Posted by cmitch

A nun from east Amsterdam,
Had a caboose as tight as a clam.
A lass slipped in his thumb,
That surely was dumb,
Now he's gotten in one helluva jam.

That would be "her" thumb if it's a lass.

[shark]

There was a young fellow named Perkin
Who was always jerkin' his gherkin
His father said "Perkin
Stop jerkin your gherkin
Your gherkins fer ferkin not jerkin!"