Are we raising a culture of losers? (no pictures)

Lately I'm seeing lots of twenty-something year olds that can't function without their parents.

I work with a woman that has a 21 year old daughter (sorry no pictures). They must talk on the phone 10 times a day. The mom is here in CA with me, the daughter goes to school in Flagstaff.

The other day the daughter calls the mom and tells her, the gloves she has aren't warm enough. How do I know what the call was about?

Because I hear the mom say, "I'll go to REI after work, buy you gloves and FedEx them to you. You should have them tomorrow".

What the hell is going on in America? When I was that age, if I told my parents my hands were cold, they would say "go buy warmer gloves".

So here are ysr_racer's rules for being a loser. If any of the following apply to you, guess what, loooooser !!

Your mom makes your meals
Your mom does your laundry
Your mom is your best friend
You still live at home
You talk to your mom every day

America is in sad shape.

I'm wondering if this is the reason we see so many mass shootings by 20 year old kids, they can't function in the real world.

[hotreds]

Bill Cosby has had a few things to say on the subject recently as well.

Wow, I wasn't expecting that. My friend's kid killed Bill Cosby's kid. Yes, Mikhail is a loser, and is right where he belongs.

[MajorCaptSilly]

Your mom makes your meals.

I cook most of the meals (dinner) in my home. My son is at college most of the year and my daughter lives 650 miles away. When they are home, I cook for everybody. The kids are on their own for breakfast/lunch unless I do pancakes on the weekend.

Your mom does your laundry

If my kids are home, my wife and I do everyone's laundry. Saves water/natural gas.

Your mom is your best friend

My wife is my daughter's best friend and I am my son's. We were parents only when they were growing up but now that they're grown, we like each other as people.

You still live at home

Thankfully that's not the case for us but the economy/job market is rough. Some kids need to live at home longer than we did. I know of some who abuse the situation. I also know some who contribute any way they can and living at home is not their planned endgame.

You talk to your mom every day

We talk to both kids nearly every day because we love them. We don't make all their decisions and we don't bail them out of every uncomfortable situation. We do offer advice and moral support.

It's really easy to see the bad stuff our young people. There are still plenty of great kids out there. It's hard for me to call any young person a "loser". Many of them haven't had a chance to win yet.

MCS

[bvilchez]

I wouldn't exactly say she's raising a loser.

My mother talks to each of my sisters daily a few times a day because of the bond they have and it is something that should be respected. Just because of that bond does not mean they are losers. It's called love. It happens between a parent and a child.

Plus the daughter is attending school. Good for her.

So please explain to me how talking everyday to the people who brought you into this world is being a loser?
My mom makes meals for me when I go home to visit? So now I'm a loser? On the contrary, remarks like the one in your first post make me wonder about individuals like you sometimes who do not think before they speak, in this case, type. Your ignorance and immaturity towards social issues makes me think there are REAL losers in this world.

Reading you post actually infuriates me. I believe you to be an older gentleman. Yet I have 18-20 year olds who work under my charge and have much more professionalism, tact, character, maturity, and many other values that you seem to lack. They would never make a post of that nature.

BTW, you sir, need to stop eavesdropping on others conversations.

[pnoon]

Coming from an expert loser.

Really? I don't doubt or disagree that the situation about gloves is sad and speaks volumes. But to generalize about losers only proves your ignorance.

Before she passed, I spoke to my mother often. Not daily, but multiple times per week.
My adult son lives at home because he can't find a job in the fkuced up economy. He helps with cooking, cleaning, errands, etc. and yes, his mother does his laundry.

So before you make yourself look even more stupid, I suggest you think before you post.

[Genetic Defect]

Originally Posted by pnoon

Coming from an expert loser.

Really? I don't doubt or disagree that the situation about gloves is sad and speaks volumes. But to generalize about losers only proves your ignorance.

Before she passed, I spoke to my mother often. Not daily, but multiple times per week.
My adult son lives at home because he can't find a job in the fkuced up economy. He helps with cooking, cleaning, errands, etc. and yes, his mother does his laundry.

So before you make yourself look even more stupid, I suggest you think before you post.

Well said Peter, as usual you say what I would but in a manner that is easier to comprehend.

[maninblack]

I love how you're making wild speculations after being nosy and listening in on someone's call. I hope one day when my boys are older, that they cosider me a friend as well as a parent and still find time to call me when they are on their own. Guess everyone can't live up to your expectations.

[Whipper Snapper]

Hmm. I am hoping that things can stay civil in here. Yes, some children take advantage of their parents. Yes, some parents spoil their grown children in an unhealthy way.
But making a statement that's anymore sweeping than the one I just made is for one, an over-generalization, and two, impossible given how every family dynamic is different.

Lastly, and this is just a side note, but traditionally throughout much of history, it was not uncommon for three generations to live under the same roof. This was done to help the family make it.

Ugh.

[CigarSquid]

Originally Posted by ysr_racer

Lately I'm seeing lots of twenty-something year olds that can't function without their parents.

I work with a woman that has a 21 year old daughter (sorry no pictures). They must talk on the phone 10 times a day. The mom is here in CA with me, the daughter goes to school in Flagstaff.

The other day the daughter calls the mom and tells her, the gloves she has aren't warm enough. How do I know what the call was about?

Because I hear the mom say, "I'll go to REI after work, buy you gloves and FedEx them to you. You should have them tomorrow".

What the hell is going on in America? When I was that age, if I told my parents my hands were cold, they would say "go buy warmer gloves".

So here are ysr_racer's rules for being a loser. If any of the following apply to you, guess what, loooooser !!

Your mom makes your meals
Your mom does your laundry
Your mom is your best friend
You still live at home
You talk to your mom every day

America is in sad shape.

I'm wondering if this is the reason we see so many mass shootings by 20 year old kids, they can't function in the real world.

As most have touched on... I disagree with these 3 the most. I would consider my parents friends.. My dad is a real best friend.

Living at home because you decide to be a dead beat is different than living there while trying to get on your feet and things going right for you

Do you have kids?

I call my parents just about every other day.. 3 days most. I do not do it for kudo's.. I do it because I love them and enjoy talking to them. I am 6 hours away from one and 2 hours from the other. I talk to them to keep up with our lives and how things are going.

Just hard to not be a looooooser when you simply try to label others for, what I think, aren't justifiable reasons.

Good day sir.

[macsauce13]

I think the point is proven here, but just in case another nod helps, I agree with everyone here but the OP.

I'm 24 and live four hours from home at law school. I talk to my family 3-4 times a week, when I'm home my mother cooks for me, she does my laundry, buys me little things to show she loves me. She knows she doesn't have to probably just like your wife, but they love their kids and want to help in any way possible. Most of my friends would answer in a similar way. We are all heading towards normal, successful lives.

Just because you don't get nurtured doesn't mean there is a problem with it. This sounds a little bit like overcompensation on your part...

[hotreds]

Perhaps the OP was a bit indelicate and generalized somewhat, but it is sadly true that the "Greatest Generation" is a group of the past the likes of which is unlikely to be seen again.

[Subvet642]

I'm not gonna pass judgement as I have no children (not for the lack of trying) or parents (I was orphaned at eight). I was raised by an aunt who wasn't the touchy-feely mommy type; she was more of an administratrix. I was cooking for myself as soon as I could reach the stove top and doing my own laundry when I could reach the controls. I had to be on my own when I turned 18 (joined the Navy), and when I was discharged, the home I grew-up in had been sold, so I lived in the woods. If not for all this, I would have been a much different person; a much lesser person.

[iaMkcK]

Originally Posted by ysr_racer

Your mom makes your meals
Your mom does your laundry
Your mom is your best friend
You still live at home
You talk to your mom every day

I live at home, and I am 24 years old. I'm just getting started into my career, and due to the government hiring freeze, I can't even move to a different job in my line of work. I am a civil servant working for the Department of the Navy, and make decent money.. But I simply can not afford to move out. I pay rent to stay here, I pay for my own meals, I do not mooch off my parents, and since the age of 18 I have been employed and never once asked my parents for money. Even when I've moved out on my own, and the houses fell through -- my parents were there to offer their house. I only accepted the offer to come back home because I forced them to let me pay rent.

My mom at times makes meals for me, my mom may at times do my laundry, I love my mom, I live at home, and that damn sure means we talk every day. Even when I lived out on my own, I talked to her almost every day. I'm grateful that my mother is still alive and that I can talk to her, and I'm not going to miss the chance because she's almost 3 times my age.

I'm pretty damn proud to be the ultimate loser.

[jjirons69]

I have opinions. I have sorry folks in my extended family, kin to me and in-laws. I can wallow in the misery they create for others or I try to not worry about the vast majority of people and try to tend to my little 2-sheep flock at home. If I can guide them out into the world with equal or better opportunities than I was provided, I'll consider myself a success. I can provide the paths to success, but I can't get it for them. That's living.

To me, a loser is someone that doesn't try.

Diamonds are nothing more than chunks of coal that stuck to their jobs.
-Malcolm Forbes

[shilala]

Any time I spend worrying about other people's kids, or how they raise them, is time wasted that I could have put into my own family. Or anything positive, for that matter.
I think the winter boredom brings out the critical in me, just the same. Too much time to think and not enough do.
I'm guilty of talking (actually texting) my daughter a number of times a day. She lives a state away. She does the whole house's laundry, has two jobs, has held over a 96% average in school forever, and is 16 years old. What pisses me off is that she's too busy to carve out time to visit very often. I love that little sh1t.

[bonjing]

Originally Posted by ysr_racer

Your mom makes your meals
Your mom does your laundry
Your mom is your best friend
You still live at home
You talk to your mom every day

.

I tried not to comment, but F-You and your high horse I miss my mom. I wish I could still talk to her everyday!

[icehog3]

My Mom passed when I was 21, and I would give anything to be able to talk with her everyday.

[Subvet642]

Originally Posted by icehog3

My Mom passed when I was 21, and I would give anything to be able to talk with her everyday.

I'd be happy enough to talk with mine just once more.

[poker]

Sorry but I disagree with the OP.

I'd be happy enough to talk with mine just once more.

This.