Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

irratebass · 10-10-2011, 08:10 AM

A man walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees that it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must be at least ten thousand dollars in it. He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's with the money in the jar?"

"Well..., you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, you get all the money in the jar and the keys to a brand new Lexus."

The man certainly isn't going to pass this up, so he asks, "What are the three tests?"

"You gotta pay first," says the bartender, "those are the rules."

So, after thinking it over a while, the man gives the bartender $10 which he stuffs into the jar.

"Okay," says the bartender, "here's what you need to do:

First - You have to drink a whole quart of tequila, in 60 seconds or less, and you can't make a face while doing it."

"Second - There's a pit bull chained in the back with a bad tooth. You have to remove that tooth with your bare hands."

"Third - There's a 90-year old lady upstairs who's never had sex. You have to take care of that problem."

The man is stunned! "I know I paid my $10 -- but I'm not an idiot! I won't do it! You'd have to be nuts to drink a quart of tequila and then do all those other things!"

"Your call," says the bartender, "but, your money stays where it is."

As time goes on, the man has a few more drinks and finally says, "Where's the damn tequila?!"

He grabs the bottle with both hands and drinks it as fast as he can. Tears stream down both cheeks -- but he doesn't make a face -- and he drinks it in 58 seconds!
Next, he staggers out the back door where he sees the pit bull chained to a pole. Soon, the people inside the bar hear loud growling, screaming, and sounds of a terrible fight – then, nothing but silence!

Just when they think that the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into the bar. His clothes are ripped to shreds and he's bleeding from bites and gashes all over his body. He drunkenly says, "Now..., where's that old woman with the bad tooth?"

10-10-2011, 08:13 AM

Saw that one comin' a mile away!

yourchoice · 10-10-2011, 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lonely Raven

Saw that one comin' a mile away!

I did not!

Skywalker · 10-10-2011, 12:44 PM

Blak Smyth · 10-10-2011, 08:15 AM

kugie · 10-10-2011, 08:15 AM

kelmac07 · 10-10-2011, 10:08 AM

themoneycollector · 10-10-2011, 01:30 PM

LOL, haha

Bax · 10-10-2011, 05:04 PM

Funny!

Bill86 · 10-10-2011, 05:06 PM

MrClean · 10-10-2011, 05:10 PM

Good one Mickey!!

GoodFella · 10-10-2011, 08:17 PM

the other one is when the dog helps the old lady out while he get tht tooth

still a good one

Mattso3000 · 10-10-2011, 05:09 PM

nice.

Ogre · 10-10-2011, 10:43 PM

Hey Mickey, did you heal up ok after that????

Moose6026 · 10-10-2011, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogre

Hey Mickey, did you heal up ok after that????

10-10-2011, 08:10 AM	#1
irratebass EMPEROR TOMPKINS Join Date: Aug 2011 First Name: Mickey Location: Mooresville, Indiana Posts: 8,313 Trading: (48)	Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh A man walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees that it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must be at least ten thousand dollars in it. He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's with the money in the jar?" "Well..., you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, you get all the money in the jar and the keys to a brand new Lexus." The man certainly isn't going to pass this up, so he asks, "What are the three tests?" "You gotta pay first," says the bartender, "those are the rules." So, after thinking it over a while, the man gives the bartender $10 which he stuffs into the jar. "Okay," says the bartender, "here's what you need to do: First - You have to drink a whole quart of tequila, in 60 seconds or less, and you can't make a face while doing it." "Second - There's a pit bull chained in the back with a bad tooth. You have to remove that tooth with your bare hands." "Third - There's a 90-year old lady upstairs who's never had sex. You have to take care of that problem." The man is stunned! "I know I paid my $10 -- but I'm not an idiot! I won't do it! You'd have to be nuts to drink a quart of tequila and then do all those other things!" "Your call," says the bartender, "but, your money stays where it is." As time goes on, the man has a few more drinks and finally says, "Where's the damn tequila?!" He grabs the bottle with both hands and drinks it as fast as he can. Tears stream down both cheeks -- but he doesn't make a face -- and he drinks it in 58 seconds! Next, he staggers out the back door where he sees the pit bull chained to a pole. Soon, the people inside the bar hear loud growling, screaming, and sounds of a terrible fight – then, nothing but silence! Just when they think that the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into the bar. His clothes are ripped to shreds and he's bleeding from bites and gashes all over his body. He drunkenly says, "Now..., where's that old woman with the bad tooth?" __________________

10-10-2011, 08:13 AM	#2
Lonely Raven Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Saw that one comin' a mile away!

10-10-2011, 12:44 PM	#4
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh __________________ Smoke what you like!!!

10-10-2011, 08:15 AM	#5
Blak Smyth Think Blue! Join Date: Jun 2011 First Name: SD Location: THE WOOD Posts: 8,486 Trading: (52)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh __________________ SUPPORT OUR TROOPS

10-10-2011, 08:15 AM	#6
kugie Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Joe Location: Billerica, Ma. Posts: 1,376 Trading: (3)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh __________________ "Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!" Dr. P. Venkman

10-10-2011, 10:08 AM	#7
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

10-10-2011, 01:30 PM	#8
themoneycollector Nicotiana Tabacum Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Hill AFB, UT Posts: 1,258 Trading: (108)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh LOL, haha

10-10-2011, 05:04 PM	#9
Bax C A P S...CAPS CAPS CAPS! Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tim Location: Ringgold,GA Posts: 2,173 Trading: (70)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Funny! __________________ I'm the most interesting man in the world... but only if you find stupid stuff really interesting.

10-10-2011, 05:06 PM	#10
Bill86 Snob Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Bill Posts: 6,704 Trading: (67)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh __________________ I'm drunk......but I'll get drunker! - Doug Stanhope

10-10-2011, 05:10 PM	#11
MrClean Bald Man Join Date: Sep 2011 First Name: Jeff Location: KC MO Posts: 2,229 Trading: (28)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Good one Mickey!! __________________ http://jeffcarrollphotos.com Not a photographer, just a dude with a camera. Proud member of the GMCGTPWHAFA

10-10-2011, 08:17 PM	#12
GoodFella out to sea Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: SC2FL Posts: 588 Trading: (7)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the other one is when the dog helps the old lady out while he get tht tooth still a good one __________________

10-10-2011, 05:09 PM	#13
Mattso3000 Will ninja for beer Join Date: Aug 2010 First Name: Matt Location: Burnsville, MN Posts: 2,842 Trading: (20)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh nice. __________________ Please Support the Troop Support Contest!

10-10-2011, 10:43 PM	#14
Ogre **CENSORED** Join Date: Apr 2010 First Name: Larry Location: Central Florida Posts: 12,068 Trading: (46)	Re: Tequilahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Hey Mickey, did you heal up ok after that???? __________________