31 Things Every Man Should Own

CBI_2 · 06-25-2009, 09:33 PM

31 Things Every Man Should Own
per Esquire

1. Cast-Iron Skillet

It's not a specialty kitchen item, which means you can cook almost anything in it. Because you never use soap on it, it'll enrich your eggs and burgers and grilled cheese and fish fillets and rib eyes with the earned flavors of a well-used grill. It's impossible to break and can go in the oven. And it will last longer than you.

2. Valid Passport

You can't even go to Canada anymore without one. Not having a passport is like not having money.

3. Multipurpose Tool

It's not that it's better than any of the seventeen individual implements it contains. It's that its seventeen implements are good enough that you don't have to carry any of them individually.

4. Waiter's Corkscrew/Bottle Opener/Knife

Corkscrews should not be expensive. Or require instruction manuals.

5. Ax

Because you need something to make firewood out of the tree that fell across your driveway.

6. WD-40

If only for the door hinges. A man's house should involve no squeaking.

7. Cordless Drill

Electric hand tools should be cordless. Eighteen volts — contractor grade — is all the power you'll ever need.

8. Weekend Shoulder Bag

Which should fit the following: a cotton blazer, jeans, khaki shorts, swim trunks, two T-shirts, a button-down, flip-flops, white sneakers, a leather belt, two pairs underwear, two pairs socks, one Dopp kit (as dictated by Esquire's Big Black Book Spring 2009).

9. Giant Wool Blanket Never Removed from the Trunk of the Car

Because you could freeze to death without one. Also, it's good for a picnic.

10. Chain Saw

Because you need something to prepare the tree for the ax.

11. Work Gloves

Without a good pair of work gloves, you blister in five minutes of picking up an ax or a chain saw. You need two pairs: rubber-coated for winter, leather for summer.

12. Carpenter's Level

Because with a small one, you can level a picture. With this one, you can level a deck.

13. Boots for the Shop

Sneakers are not for the garage.

14. Boots for Everywhere Else

These are custom-fitted to your feet, so you won't go through two weeks of blistering and one week of healing before they're comfortable. And they're guaranteed for life, so you'll never buy another pair again.

15. Jack

Cars come with inferior jacks. You need a better one.

16.Claw Hammer

Because gravity. A good heavy hammer changes everything.

17. Coleman Lantern

An electric lantern makes your campsite look cold. This one makes it look warm.

18. Chef's Knife

With a good kitchen knife, you're holding something heavy and well-balanced. The food yields to it. Cooking becomes a craft, not a chore.

19. Flying Disc

This isn't the flimsy, feathery Frisbee you played with as a kid. It's the flying disc sanctioned by the Ultimate Players Association for its championship series.

20. U.S. Road Atlas

The man who only uses a GPS is half a man.

21. Air Pump

No electric model has improved on the ease or reliability of a well-built, hand-powered floor pump. And you can't take an electric one tubing on the river.

22. Jumper Cables

Not so much for you but for the stranger stuck in the parking lot.

23. Charcoal Grill

Gas grills are nice. We like the gas grill. But the metal kettle is crucial. Not because charcoal makes food taste better than a gas grill (it probably does, a little) but because with a charcoal grill you can smoke things. And smoking things can kill two, three, four hours. Hours of drinking and basting and Cigar smoking. Beautiful.

24. Card Holder

To be placed in the breast pocket of your jacket.

25. Pocket Knife

One with a two-and-a-half-inch blade: big enough for most jobs, small enough not to weigh you down.

26. Grease

None of that silicone-based, high-tech synthetic goop. Something made of dinosaurs. Something that smells like God's garage.

27. Lucky Charm

Because it gives the comfort of faith to the faithless — like when you really need the chain saw to start.

28. $1,000 Hidden in Your House

Because $500 is too little and $2,000 is too much.

29. LED Flashlight

LED flashlights are blindingly bright, shockproof, and, maybe best of all, run for a hundred hours on four AA batteries, which is at least seventy more hours than an incandescent bulb.

30. Money Clip

To be placed in the front pocket of your pants.

31. Joy of Cooking

It's the Old Testament of cookbooks. Low on bombast. Heavy on information. Lots of lists. It begat all others. And if you want to cook it, it's in there, including possum.

Looks like I need to go shopping.

kgoings · 06-25-2009, 09:40 PM

32. A Palio - Because a cutter by any other name just doesnt cut it!

longknocker · 06-25-2009, 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgoings

32. A Palio - Because a cutter by any other name just doesnt cut it!

33. Plenty of your favorite Cigars!

Mr. Ed · 06-25-2009, 09:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CBI_2

[center]
19. Flying Disc

This isn't the flimsy, feathery Frisbee you played with as a kid. It's the flying disc sanctioned by the Ultimate Players Association for its championship series.

Scratching my head about this one

06-25-2009, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Ed

Scratching my head about this one

Yeah, me to. Replace with a 1911 handgun.

jjirons69 · 06-25-2009, 11:23 PM

34. A pair of nail clippers in your front pocket.

06-26-2009, 03:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jjirons69

34. A pair of nail clippers in your front pocket.

This is covered by:

Quote:

3. Multipurpose Tool
It's not that it's better than any of the seventeen individual implements it contains. It's that its seventeen implements are good enough that you don't have to carry any of them individually.

And

Quote:

25. Pocket Knife
One with a two-and-a-half-inch blade: big enough for most jobs, small enough not to weigh you down.

If you still need nail clippers after this, you are in trouble.

taltos · 06-26-2009, 06:57 AM

37. Duct tape. Fixes anything.

Starchild · 06-26-2009, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zonedar

Yeah, me to. Replace with a 1911 handgun.

I think that could be counted under #21 Lucky Charm

A handgun is honestly the first thing I thought of when I read #21

Skywalker · 06-27-2009, 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kgoings

32. A Palio - Because a cutter by any other name just doesnt cut it!

Yeah!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by longknocker

33. Plenty of your favorite Cigars!

F@#K Yeah!!!

And a Ronson Lighter

kaisersozei · 06-26-2009, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Ed

Scratching my head about this one

I laughed because I have an Ultimate frisbee in my car trunk. Been a habit of having one around since--well--since college so many years ago. We'd "whip out the Bee" on Fridays after class.

I think I might find someone to throw with after work today!

Mr. Ed · 06-26-2009, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaisersozei

I laughed because I have an Ultimate frisbee in my car trunk. Been a habit of having one around since--well--since college so many years ago. We'd "whip out the Bee" on Fridays after class.

I think I might find someone to throw with after work today!

I would say if we could substitute I would put in a football, the good old pigskin, instead of a fancy-schmancy flying disk.

bigloo · 06-25-2009, 11:26 PM

35: Big Screen TV.

MajorCaptSilly · 06-25-2009, 11:30 PM

36. Plastic vampire teeth.

MCS

06-26-2009, 12:04 AM

were is the sword cain on that list ?

The Poet · 06-26-2009, 10:29 AM

Growing up, I was taught a man should always have three things on him - cash, a pocket knife, and fire of some sort. Today it seems to be down to two - a cell phone and a credit card.

Take me, Jesus - I'm ready.

SeanGAR · 06-26-2009, 10:37 AM

Yeah, you need some way of making fire. I'm not into zippos, but one would fit a "must" list better than a flying disk .. especially since the disk doesn't do a good job of lighting that grill.

TheTraveler · 06-26-2009, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeanGAR

Yeah, you need some way of making fire. I'm not into zippos, but one would fit a "must" list better than a flying disk .. especially since the disk doesn't do a good job of lighting that grill.

You could conceivably kill a squirrel, bird or rabbit with it in a survival situation though. Or you could pan for gold, or catch rain water, or use it for a plate, or use it for a chamber pot ... or lose it on the neighbors roof playing drunken frisbee at 3 am!

gorob23 · 06-26-2009, 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Poet

Take me, Jesus - I'm ready.

Don't cut the line

Rob

Sorry all I really need, cigars, kestrel 200sci, swim gear and running shoes

Starscream · 06-26-2009, 10:34 AM

I don't have a passport.

06-25-2009, 09:33 PM	#1
CBI_2 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: In my skin. Posts: 2,066 Trading: (0)	31 Things Every Man Should Own 31 Things Every Man Should Own per Esquire 1. Cast-Iron Skillet It's not a specialty kitchen item, which means you can cook almost anything in it. Because you never use soap on it, it'll enrich your eggs and burgers and grilled cheese and fish fillets and rib eyes with the earned flavors of a well-used grill. It's impossible to break and can go in the oven. And it will last longer than you. 2. Valid Passport You can't even go to Canada anymore without one. Not having a passport is like not having money. 3. Multipurpose Tool It's not that it's better than any of the seventeen individual implements it contains. It's that its seventeen implements are good enough that you don't have to carry any of them individually. 4. Waiter's Corkscrew/Bottle Opener/Knife Corkscrews should not be expensive. Or require instruction manuals. 5. Ax Because you need something to make firewood out of the tree that fell across your driveway. 6. WD-40 If only for the door hinges. A man's house should involve no squeaking. 7. Cordless Drill Electric hand tools should be cordless. Eighteen volts — contractor grade — is all the power you'll ever need. 8. Weekend Shoulder Bag Which should fit the following: a cotton blazer, jeans, khaki shorts, swim trunks, two T-shirts, a button-down, flip-flops, white sneakers, a leather belt, two pairs underwear, two pairs socks, one Dopp kit (as dictated by Esquire's Big Black Book Spring 2009). 9. Giant Wool Blanket Never Removed from the Trunk of the Car Because you could freeze to death without one. Also, it's good for a picnic. 10. Chain Saw Because you need something to prepare the tree for the ax. 11. Work Gloves Without a good pair of work gloves, you blister in five minutes of picking up an ax or a chain saw. You need two pairs: rubber-coated for winter, leather for summer. 12. Carpenter's Level Because with a small one, you can level a picture. With this one, you can level a deck. 13. Boots for the Shop Sneakers are not for the garage. 14. Boots for Everywhere Else These are custom-fitted to your feet, so you won't go through two weeks of blistering and one week of healing before they're comfortable. And they're guaranteed for life, so you'll never buy another pair again. 15. Jack Cars come with inferior jacks. You need a better one. 16.Claw Hammer Because gravity. A good heavy hammer changes everything. 17. Coleman Lantern An electric lantern makes your campsite look cold. This one makes it look warm. 18. Chef's Knife With a good kitchen knife, you're holding something heavy and well-balanced. The food yields to it. Cooking becomes a craft, not a chore. 19. Flying Disc This isn't the flimsy, feathery Frisbee you played with as a kid. It's the flying disc sanctioned by the Ultimate Players Association for its championship series. 20. U.S. Road Atlas The man who only uses a GPS is half a man. 21. Air Pump No electric model has improved on the ease or reliability of a well-built, hand-powered floor pump. And you can't take an electric one tubing on the river. 22. Jumper Cables Not so much for you but for the stranger stuck in the parking lot. 23. Charcoal Grill Gas grills are nice. We like the gas grill. But the metal kettle is crucial. Not because charcoal makes food taste better than a gas grill (it probably does, a little) but because with a charcoal grill you can smoke things. And smoking things can kill two, three, four hours. Hours of drinking and basting and Cigar smoking. Beautiful. 24. Card Holder To be placed in the breast pocket of your jacket. 25. Pocket Knife One with a two-and-a-half-inch blade: big enough for most jobs, small enough not to weigh you down. 26. Grease None of that silicone-based, high-tech synthetic goop. Something made of dinosaurs. Something that smells like God's garage. 27. Lucky Charm Because it gives the comfort of faith to the faithless — like when you really need the chain saw to start. 28. $1,000 Hidden in Your House Because $500 is too little and $2,000 is too much. 29. LED Flashlight LED flashlights are blindingly bright, shockproof, and, maybe best of all, run for a hundred hours on four AA batteries, which is at least seventy more hours than an incandescent bulb. 30. Money Clip To be placed in the front pocket of your pants. 31. Joy of Cooking It's the Old Testament of cookbooks. Low on bombast. Heavy on information. Lots of lists. It begat all others. And if you want to cook it, it's in there, including possum. Looks like I need to go shopping. __________________ "The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff Last edited by CBI_2; 06-25-2009 at 09:45 PM.

06-25-2009, 11:23 PM	#6
jjirons69 Haberdasher Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Jamie Location: Chucktown, SC Posts: 4,120 Trading: (94)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own 34. A pair of nail clippers in your front pocket. __________________ Somebody has to go back and get a chitload of dimes

06-26-2009, 06:57 AM	#8
taltos Really, really old Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: Saugus, MA Posts: 2,486 Trading: (3)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own 37. Duct tape. Fixes anything. __________________ Jimmy, some of its magic, some of its tragic, but I had a good life all the way. He Went to Paris, J. Buffett

06-25-2009, 11:26 PM	#13
bigloo Crazy like a fox Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Lu Location: Rose City Posts: 905 Trading: (27)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own 35: Big Screen TV.

06-25-2009, 11:30 PM	#14
MajorCaptSilly Sklee Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Mishawaka, IN Posts: 2,523 Trading: (30)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own 36. Plastic vampire teeth. MCS __________________ Pillsbury, Minneapolis, Prince, Spoon Bridge and Cherry, coinkydink?

06-25-2009, 09:40 PM	#2
kgoings Cigarologist Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Kirk Location: Highlands Ranch, Co Posts: 1,979 Trading: (42)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own 32. A Palio - Because a cutter by any other name just doesnt cut it! __________________ Your silly little opinion has been noted!

06-26-2009, 12:04 AM	#15
adampc22 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own were is the sword cain on that list ?

06-26-2009, 10:29 AM	#16
The Poet Il megglior fabbro Join Date: Jun 2009 First Name: Thomas Location: Hickory, NC Posts: 8,420 Trading: (2)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own Growing up, I was taught a man should always have three things on him - cash, a pocket knife, and fire of some sort. Today it seems to be down to two - a cell phone and a credit card. Take me, Jesus - I'm ready.

06-26-2009, 10:37 AM	#17
SeanGAR Crotchety Geezer Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Radford VA Posts: 911 Trading: (3)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own Yeah, you need some way of making fire. I'm not into zippos, but one would fit a "must" list better than a flying disk .. especially since the disk doesn't do a good job of lighting that grill. __________________ How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?

06-26-2009, 10:34 AM	#20
Starscream Knowhutimean, Vern? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andy Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA Posts: 10,237 Trading: (4)	Re: 31 Things Every Man Should Own I don't have a passport. __________________ Insert quote here.