Adoption update!

Gargoyle · 04-21-2009, 12:58 PM

It has been a long time since I have been active on CA (and most other things for that matter) since the adoption process has started. Deciding to take on such a large group of kids was definitely a choice made with a fair amount of idealism, ignorance and wishful thinking!!!!

Three of the four kids are now with us, with the last joining us just 10 days. It has been wonderful and completely mentally & physically exhausting at the same time. We are settling into the mom & dad roles ok and learning on the job with some bumps & scrapes along the way.

The most difficult part has been learning backwards through the age range... we started with the oldest and are getting progressively younger as we re-introduce the siblings into the family. A newborn requires physical attention for food, warmth, cleanliness, etc... We started parenting with a 4 1/2 year old that needed physical, emotional, intellectual and active playtime attention -- and he could critique your efforts and blunders!!!! Talk about a challenging opening into the world of parenting!

Day by day we are getting the hang of it and are getting better at things... at which point a new child would be introduced and totally disrupt things again.

We have just one more and then can finally start to settle in and get some stability.

My man cave in the basement is all but gone... replaced by toys, toys and more toys. Metallica, Cradle of Filth, NIN and System of a Down have been replaced by endless reruns of Dora the Explorer, Diego and Little Bear. It is awesome though!

The four year old is fascinated with farts & poops... and speaks endlessly about them, which is a constant source of amusement. The three year old is doing great and transitioning from a pristine china doll into a little kid that likes to run, play and get dirty -- she's coming out of a shell. The two year old is a funny little personality that is fascinated with everything and enjoys doing little things like rubbing beans, jelly and peanut butter in his hair. So many simple joys everywhere to be found!

I'll post up some pics once we get further along the adoption process... we are still in pre-adoptive foster care right now and that will hopefully change in the coming months.

Bruzee · 04-21-2009, 01:00 PM

Awesome story bro. Take a special person to do what you and your Mrs. are doing. Best of luck my friend, and may God bless you!

md4958 · 04-21-2009, 01:06 PM

Thanks for the progress report Patrick!

massphatness · 04-21-2009, 01:12 PM

If we start a Farts & Poops banter thread, can your son participate, Sham?

Its so good to hear that things are progressing well.

Scottw · 04-21-2009, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by massphatness

If we start a Farts & Poops banter thread, can your son participate, Sham?

Its so good to hear that things are progressing well.

I'd be in on the Farts & Poops Banter!!

Gargoyle · 04-21-2009, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by massphatness

If we start a Farts & Poops banter thread, can your son participate, Sham?

Its so good to hear that things are progressing well.

I would need to type for him, but he would love to contribute!!!

We have a "joking" game when I drive him to school on my way to work. There is a 30 minute period where we go back and forth seeing various animals and dinosaurs farting, pooping or peeing in the woods, on a car, etc.

D: Hey daddy, I see a T-Rex pooping in the woods!!!
Me: Where is it? I can't see it?
D: I'm joking!! (follwed by hysterical laugher) Your turn!

... and so it goes. Your creativity gets pushed to the max after 20 minutes of this because he doesn't like repeats, or you'll hear "no, you already did that!"

Naturally, the infantile part of my is enjoying being able to make fart and poop jokes with the kids. It is more socially acceptable then when I was a 42 year old with no children.

14holestogie · 04-21-2009, 02:00 PM

Patrick,

What you are doing warms the heart. It takes a special person or couple to take on these added responsibilities, but the rewards will far outweigh your duties.

Continued success as your family comes together.

taltos · 04-21-2009, 02:12 PM

Patrick, you and your wife are special people who are candidates for sainthood! What you guys are doing for these children is remarkable. My prayers go out for your success and for others to do what you guys are doing.

massphatness · 04-21-2009, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gargoyle

We have a "joking" game when I drive him to school on my way to work. There is a 30 minute period where we go back and forth seeing various animals and dinosaurs farting, pooping or peeing in the woods, on a car, etc.

D: Hey daddy, I see a T-Rex pooping in the woods!!!
Me: Where is it? I can't see it?
D: I'm joking!! (follwed by hysterical laugher) Your turn!

... and so it goes. Your creativity gets pushed to the max after 20 minutes of this because he doesn't like repeats, or you'll hear "no, you already did that!"

You could always use the classic HERF standby:

"Daddy, I see Tim Ricker pooping at Vin's herf and he smells like Vin's dad"

04-21-2009, 01:10 PM

Great to hear Patrick. We are all pulling for you and your new family!

May God bless all of you.

Let us know if you need anything.

WildBlueSooner · 04-21-2009, 01:23 PM

Farts and Poops Banter...I have been looking for a banter thread to start posting in!

mosesbotbol · 04-21-2009, 01:25 PM

Wow. Good for you. There's a special place in heaven for opening your heart & home to those kids.

Smokin Gator · 04-21-2009, 01:31 PM

Thanks so much for the update. Of course there will be many bumps along the way, but consistency in your actions and responses will work wonders over time. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

MedicCook · 04-21-2009, 01:39 PM

Glad things are going well Patrick.

BeerAdvocate · 04-21-2009, 01:55 PM

It takes a big heart to do what you are doing! Keep it up. You are making a HUGE differance in a few childerns lifes!!!

BlackDog · 04-21-2009, 03:19 PM

Gargoyle, that is fantastic news. Blessings to you and your family. There are few more important things a person can do than to give a child a loving home. The world needs more people who will open their homes, and their hearts, for kids like this.

Last year my wife and I adopted a little boy that had been a foster child in our home since 2 days old. His mom was chemically dependent, and has now disappeared. He will always have developmental problems due to his mother's abusive behavior during her pregnancy, but he is a joy to us.

I hope your children bring you and your wife much joy too. Thank you for what you are doing for these kids.

gnukfu · 04-21-2009, 03:19 PM

Thanks for the update Patrick! Enjoy every moment! They grow up quick!

04-21-2009, 03:21 PM

This is an awsome story and a great great adventure that never ends... Enjoy your time and congrats to you and your wife for so much love and efforts. You both are AMAZING ! Long life to the new family

04-21-2009, 12:58 PM	#1
Gargoyle Got Coffee? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Patrick Location: Central MA Posts: 389 Trading: (7)	Adoption update! It has been a long time since I have been active on CA (and most other things for that matter) since the adoption process has started. Deciding to take on such a large group of kids was definitely a choice made with a fair amount of idealism, ignorance and wishful thinking!!!! Three of the four kids are now with us, with the last joining us just 10 days. It has been wonderful and completely mentally & physically exhausting at the same time. We are settling into the mom & dad roles ok and learning on the job with some bumps & scrapes along the way. The most difficult part has been learning backwards through the age range... we started with the oldest and are getting progressively younger as we re-introduce the siblings into the family. A newborn requires physical attention for food, warmth, cleanliness, etc... We started parenting with a 4 1/2 year old that needed physical, emotional, intellectual and active playtime attention -- and he could critique your efforts and blunders!!!! Talk about a challenging opening into the world of parenting! Day by day we are getting the hang of it and are getting better at things... at which point a new child would be introduced and totally disrupt things again. We have just one more and then can finally start to settle in and get some stability. My man cave in the basement is all but gone... replaced by toys, toys and more toys. Metallica, Cradle of Filth, NIN and System of a Down have been replaced by endless reruns of Dora the Explorer, Diego and Little Bear. It is awesome though! The four year old is fascinated with farts & poops... and speaks endlessly about them, which is a constant source of amusement. The three year old is doing great and transitioning from a pristine china doll into a little kid that likes to run, play and get dirty -- she's coming out of a shell. The two year old is a funny little personality that is fascinated with everything and enjoys doing little things like rubbing beans, jelly and peanut butter in his hair. So many simple joys everywhere to be found! I'll post up some pics once we get further along the adoption process... we are still in pre-adoptive foster care right now and that will hopefully change in the coming months. __________________ Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it. ~Not Your Average Dictionary

04-21-2009, 01:00 PM	#2
Bruzee Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: D Location: San Diego Posts: 1,508 Trading: (30)	Re: Adoption update! Awesome story bro. Take a special person to do what you and your Mrs. are doing. Best of luck my friend, and may God bless you! __________________

04-21-2009, 01:06 PM	#3
md4958 Captain Cannoli Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Moe Location: Suffield, CT Posts: 5,712 Trading: (62)	Re: Adoption update! Thanks for the progress report Patrick! __________________ "One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher.

04-21-2009, 01:12 PM	#4
massphatness Where's my buffaloooo ... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Vin Location: MassHolia Posts: 12,690 Trading: (206)	Re: Adoption update! If we start a Farts & Poops banter thread, can your son participate, Sham? Its so good to hear that things are progressing well. __________________ *Help Support The Navy SEAL Foundation: HERE*

04-21-2009, 02:00 PM	#7
14holestogie Serial banter killer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tim Location: Clintonville, WI Posts: 4,341 Trading: (52)	Re: Adoption update! Patrick, What you are doing warms the heart. It takes a special person or couple to take on these added responsibilities, but the rewards will far outweigh your duties. Continued success as your family comes together. __________________ *I loves me a Parti*

04-21-2009, 02:12 PM	#8
taltos Really, really old Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: Saugus, MA Posts: 2,486 Trading: (3)	Re: Adoption update! Patrick, you and your wife are special people who are candidates for sainthood! What you guys are doing for these children is remarkable. My prayers go out for your success and for others to do what you guys are doing. __________________ Jimmy, some of its magic, some of its tragic, but I had a good life all the way. He Went to Paris, J. Buffett

04-21-2009, 01:10 PM	#10
ahc4353 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Adoption update! Great to hear Patrick. We are all pulling for you and your new family! May God bless all of you. Let us know if you need anything.

04-21-2009, 01:23 PM	#11
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: Adoption update! Farts and Poops Banter...I have been looking for a banter thread to start posting in! __________________ "To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur

04-21-2009, 01:25 PM	#12
mosesbotbol That's a Corgi Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Moses Location: Boston Posts: 6,171 Trading: (6)	Re: Adoption update! Wow. Good for you. There's a special place in heaven for opening your heart & home to those kids. __________________ Port Wine & Claret \| British Cars \| Welsh Corgi's

04-21-2009, 01:31 PM	#13
Smokin Gator Just plain insane! Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: The Swamp Posts: 6,237 Trading: (106)	Re: Adoption update! Thanks so much for the update. Of course there will be many bumps along the way, but consistency in your actions and responses will work wonders over time. My thoughts and prayers are with you. __________________ Check out the Cigar Asylum Newbie Sampler Trade

04-21-2009, 01:39 PM	#14
MedicCook Mila smoked my cigar Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Ryan Location: Schaghticoke, NY Posts: 10,946 Trading: (7)	Re: Adoption update! Glad things are going well Patrick. __________________ 27 World Series Championship's "If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.", Zino Davidoff

04-21-2009, 01:55 PM	#15
BeerAdvocate BeerHunter Join Date: Mar 2009 First Name: Travis Location: Topeka, KS Posts: 1,912 Trading: (45)	Re: Adoption update! It takes a big heart to do what you are doing! Keep it up. You are making a HUGE differance in a few childerns lifes!!! __________________ *I Brew the Beer I Drink*

04-21-2009, 03:19 PM	#16
BlackDog Gonna make you groove... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Warren Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 2,468 Trading: (19)	Re: Adoption update! Gargoyle, that is fantastic news. Blessings to you and your family. There are few more important things a person can do than to give a child a loving home. The world needs more people who will open their homes, and their hearts, for kids like this. Last year my wife and I adopted a little boy that had been a foster child in our home since 2 days old. His mom was chemically dependent, and has now disappeared. He will always have developmental problems due to his mother's abusive behavior during her pregnancy, but he is a joy to us. I hope your children bring you and your wife much joy too. Thank you for what you are doing for these kids. __________________ "We live in the good of this."

04-21-2009, 03:19 PM	#17
gnukfu I like cigars Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: George Location: Massholia Posts: 1,466 Trading: (27)	Re: Adoption update! Thanks for the update Patrick! Enjoy every moment! They grow up quick! __________________ Curious George

04-21-2009, 03:21 PM	#18
Emerald Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Adoption update! This is an awsome story and a great great adventure that never ends... Enjoy your time and congrats to you and your wife for so much love and efforts. You both are AMAZING ! Long life to the new family