posing a question need some guidance and thoughts

G G · 10-07-2011, 11:25 AM

I have a question for all the brothers and sisters here to help me know how to proceed.

Most of you know that my mom was just diagnosed with cancer a few days ago. She is in great spirits, but the cancer has already spread to her hip (bone) and brain. Although she has a positive outlook, there is probably going to come a day that she isn't able to sit at her computer and try to get on fb and email and stuff like that. I have the idea to get her an ipad so that she can still stay in touch, as we do have quite a large extended family on fb that are in other states.
I currently don't have the disposable money to purchase it on my own, with my wife making a lot less money than she used to and being umemployed for a year and a half.

Here is the part I need you input on: I was wondering if it would be considered crass or rude or whatever to go on fb and post a donation kind of thing where people that are her friends and family could maybe chip in and help me buy it for her? I want to do good by mama, but I don't want to look bad trying to do it. Any opinions or thoughts would be very appreciated as you guys have certainly helped me choose the right way everytime I have asked. Thanks

10-07-2011, 11:38 AM

That's a tough call, Greg. I'd do it myself, but I've been known to make very poor public broadcasts if you know what I mean.

And, In all seriousness and not trying to be a downer...but if the cancer has spread to her brain, how much longer does she have before dementia rears it's ugly head?

I had a very good friend of mine have to go through this same thing with his Mom when we were teens, and the cancer really had an effect on her personality as soon as it went to her brain.

Just something to think about.

G G · 10-07-2011, 11:45 AM

Well it's fairly early, and she is now doing radiation so we will have to see how that works. I'm not trying to be one of those poor me beggars. I meant to post that my brother will chip in but he's in much the same or worse shape than me. I just thought if we could get 15 or 20 of her friends and family to chip in it's not much for each person. I don't know the more I hear it in my head the worse it kinda sounds to me. I don't know, there are lots of weird thoughts in my head the last few days. I ppreciate the input Eric, it certainly isn't something I would want to see no one else have to go through.

sevans105 · 10-07-2011, 11:45 AM

Greg, I feel your pain. Lost my mom this last fall to brain cancer. Tell you what. I'll post a bunch of cigars up for sale. Proceeds to the "Greg's Mom" fund. When we went through it, facebook and a blog were a way for all of us to keep in touch and updated. Due to the brain cancer, Mom lost some pieces of herself, but having an ipad, with LARGE buttons/icons and fonts made it so she was able to stay connected and read the books she loved. I'll go ahead and start the thread on the WTS side. Cancer is an evil evil thing and must be destroyed.

Scott

Blak Smyth · 10-07-2011, 11:46 AM

Greg, I think it is a good idea but maybe there is a better way.
Example:
I lost a dear family friend to breast cancer a couple years ago. I had some "Fight Breast Cancer" t-shirts made with all the proceeds being donated to research. This maybe a viable option for you to try. I always had a hard time asking people for money it definitley helps if you can offer them something in return for their donation.

Let me know if you need any help with something like this!
You know what, I have some t-shirts left as well, maybe I can ship them to you to sell for this cause. Although they are directed toward fighting breast cancer, interested?

Would anybody on here be interested in such a purchase for a good cause?

kelmac07 · 10-07-2011, 11:54 AM

Greg...first and foremost, Kellie and I send our sincerest condolences. I know it must be extremely difficult to see your mother experience cancer. While I love the idea of getting her an Ipad to stay in touch with friends and family, I don't think "soliciting" (maybe a bad choice of words, forgive me) for funds on Facebook is the way to go. Like Shane said, a little insensitive. Not to be too brash, but it sends off that "mooch signal" automatically, whatever the cause. I love Scotts idea of starting a sale to benefit the cause though.

Those that know you will snatch up some sticks and contribute to the cause because you are a tremendous and caring BOTL that we all love.

sevans105 · 10-07-2011, 11:54 AM

WTS thread posted. Under "Greg's Mom's Fund" Good luck Brother!

sevans105 · 10-07-2011, 12:15 PM

Ok, had to fix the offer due to TOS issues (no cubans) Now, its listed as "Greg's Mom's Fund REVISED" Buy away!

wayner123 · 10-07-2011, 12:25 PM

First off, sorry to hear this about your mother. Hope she can recover or at least go through it with ease.

Secondly, why an Ipad? There are other more economical pads out there.

mosesbotbol · 10-07-2011, 01:17 PM

So sorry to read about your mom's condition.

I would email each person you are considering with a personal email. Targeting people directly will have more success.

I would also consider Voice to Text software or an iPad clone.

If people know your situation and value your mom; you'll get the money for iPad.

357 · 10-07-2011, 01:19 PM

Greg,

A friend's father recently was struggling with cancer and it became very difficult for him to move around. They got him a Droid Tablet, and he absolutely loved it. He loved being connected and getting to interact with people. I haven't searched the specifics, but there are less costly hardware platforms than Apple. I'm not trying to play the old MS/Apple game, just pointing out that when on a budget you might want to consider other brands.

Mike

G G · 10-07-2011, 04:08 PM

Okay, I am overwhelmed to say the least. I didn't want this to be a moocher please send me money at all. I shoulda known that there would be some of you friends that would do something to help, but my mind is kinda scrambled somewhat since we got the news. I didn't really consider all the implications of posting this, but I shoulda. Secondly to Mac, the input is valued (as it is from everyone here) and I didn't really think it would ever be something I would post publicly on fb, I woulda probably only sent messages to her (our) friends and family. And then there is the fear of getting too much money and then having to return it if that happens. I am now a little mixed up and feeling a little badly for the whole thing. If i had a bunch of cigars I could sell to help the cause so to speak i would do it in a new york minute, but the truth is I haven't purchased very many cigars in the past year and a half. Not that I am in the poor house, we have just been focusing on other things since my wife finally found a job 6 month's ago. I have plenty of cigars though so don't get any other ideas, they were mostly all bombed and gifted to me from all the brothers here.

Scott, I don't know what to say to you brother, thanks seems very small, and I am humbled in what you are doing. I am so sorry to hear about your mom, and I guess I am where you were at a short time ago. I am trying to stay positive in my faith and I know God is in control of the situation, the statistics say that only 5% of people that have the kind of cancer mom has is alive at the 5 year mark.

10-07-2011, 10:27 PM

Greg, sorry to hear about this brother. Try to remain strong and do what you can to keep your mother and the rest of your family the same. You have another family here that is here for you brother.

Devanmc · 10-08-2011, 05:05 AM

i want to send GG a decent about but i dont know the current donation total of things. who is doing the math? could you please PM me?

I also went searching for a discount on an Ipad. I know its pretty laughable but if i order it threw AAFEs(military exchange) i can get 10bucks off one. so 489 for a 16gb wifi Ipad 2. No taxes and free shipping

G G · 10-08-2011, 06:27 AM

Okay guys this went way too fast, and there is enough to buy the ipad. Please don't send anymore, because I really don't want to get more than I need. You guys have been more than generous and i appreciate it from the bottom of my and my families hearts. I know there is cheaper things out there and one of the reasons that I wanted to get her an ipad is because i know a few people who have one and they love it, plus I have an iphone and I am gonna have to teach her how to use it and i wont have to learn a new system to teach her. I will never forget what yall have done to help us. God Bless everyone here for being friends.

Thanks for your help Devan, I appreciate it immensely.

Devanmc · 10-08-2011, 06:36 AM

hmmmm what is this...

shark · 10-08-2011, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Devanmc

hmmmm what is this...

Way to go, Devan!

cmitch · 10-08-2011, 02:12 PM

Paying it forward and there's none better to receive than Greg's mom. I wish I could have jumped in on this. Maybe things will be better down the road.

emopunker2004 · 10-08-2011, 06:42 AM

o snaps

Don Fernando · 10-08-2011, 06:53 AM

if anybody needs that shipping addy for some added ammo ......

ask pnoon, keeper of the rolodex

10-07-2011, 11:25 AM	#1
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,725 Trading: (10)	posing a question need some guidance and thoughts I have a question for all the brothers and sisters here to help me know how to proceed. Most of you know that my mom was just diagnosed with cancer a few days ago. She is in great spirits, but the cancer has already spread to her hip (bone) and brain. Although she has a positive outlook, there is probably going to come a day that she isn't able to sit at her computer and try to get on fb and email and stuff like that. I have the idea to get her an ipad so that she can still stay in touch, as we do have quite a large extended family on fb that are in other states. I currently don't have the disposable money to purchase it on my own, with my wife making a lot less money than she used to and being umemployed for a year and a half. Here is the part I need you input on: I was wondering if it would be considered crass or rude or whatever to go on fb and post a donation kind of thing where people that are her friends and family could maybe chip in and help me buy it for her? I want to do good by mama, but I don't want to look bad trying to do it. Any opinions or thoughts would be very appreciated as you guys have certainly helped me choose the right way everytime I have asked. Thanks

10-07-2011, 11:38 AM	#2
Lonely Raven Guest Posts: n/a	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts That's a tough call, Greg. I'd do it myself, but I've been known to make very poor public broadcasts if you know what I mean. And, In all seriousness and not trying to be a downer...but if the cancer has spread to her brain, how much longer does she have before dementia rears it's ugly head? I had a very good friend of mine have to go through this same thing with his Mom when we were teens, and the cancer really had an effect on her personality as soon as it went to her brain. Just something to think about.

10-07-2011, 11:45 AM	#3
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,725 Trading: (10)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Well it's fairly early, and she is now doing radiation so we will have to see how that works. I'm not trying to be one of those poor me beggars. I meant to post that my brother will chip in but he's in much the same or worse shape than me. I just thought if we could get 15 or 20 of her friends and family to chip in it's not much for each person. I don't know the more I hear it in my head the worse it kinda sounds to me. I don't know, there are lots of weird thoughts in my head the last few days. I ppreciate the input Eric, it certainly isn't something I would want to see no one else have to go through.

10-07-2011, 11:45 AM	#4
sevans105 Alpha Zombie Wolf "Sceve" Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Scott Location: Southern Minnesota Posts: 1,786 Trading: (30)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Greg, I feel your pain. Lost my mom this last fall to brain cancer. Tell you what. I'll post a bunch of cigars up for sale. Proceeds to the "Greg's Mom" fund. When we went through it, facebook and a blog were a way for all of us to keep in touch and updated. Due to the brain cancer, Mom lost some pieces of herself, but having an ipad, with LARGE buttons/icons and fonts made it so she was able to stay connected and read the books she loved. I'll go ahead and start the thread on the WTS side. Cancer is an evil evil thing and must be destroyed. Scott __________________

10-07-2011, 11:46 AM	#5
Blak Smyth Think Blue! Join Date: Jun 2011 First Name: SD Location: THE WOOD Posts: 8,486 Trading: (52)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Greg, I think it is a good idea but maybe there is a better way. Example: I lost a dear family friend to breast cancer a couple years ago. I had some "Fight Breast Cancer" t-shirts made with all the proceeds being donated to research. This maybe a viable option for you to try. I always had a hard time asking people for money it definitley helps if you can offer them something in return for their donation. Let me know if you need any help with something like this! You know what, I have some t-shirts left as well, maybe I can ship them to you to sell for this cause. Although they are directed toward fighting breast cancer, interested? Would anybody on here be interested in such a purchase for a good cause? __________________ SUPPORT OUR TROOPS Last edited by Blak Smyth; 10-07-2011 at 11:54 AM.

10-07-2011, 11:54 AM	#6
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Greg...first and foremost, Kellie and I send our sincerest condolences. I know it must be extremely difficult to see your mother experience cancer. While I love the idea of getting her an Ipad to stay in touch with friends and family, I don't think "soliciting" (maybe a bad choice of words, forgive me) for funds on Facebook is the way to go. Like Shane said, a little insensitive. Not to be too brash, but it sends off that "mooch signal" automatically, whatever the cause. I love Scotts idea of starting a sale to benefit the cause though. Those that know you will snatch up some sticks and contribute to the cause because you are a tremendous and caring BOTL that we all love. __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

10-07-2011, 12:15 PM	#8
sevans105 Alpha Zombie Wolf "Sceve" Join Date: Jul 2010 First Name: Scott Location: Southern Minnesota Posts: 1,786 Trading: (30)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Ok, had to fix the offer due to TOS issues (no cubans) Now, its listed as "Greg's Mom's Fund REVISED" Buy away! __________________

10-07-2011, 12:25 PM	#9
wayner123 Country Gentleman Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Deltona, FL Posts: 2,351 Trading: (159)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts First off, sorry to hear this about your mother. Hope she can recover or at least go through it with ease. Secondly, why an Ipad? There are other more economical pads out there. __________________ 'It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife; But every fool will be quarrelling.'

10-07-2011, 01:17 PM	#10
mosesbotbol That's a Corgi Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Moses Location: Boston Posts: 6,171 Trading: (6)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts So sorry to read about your mom's condition. I would email each person you are considering with a personal email. Targeting people directly will have more success. I would also consider Voice to Text software or an iPad clone. If people know your situation and value your mom; you'll get the money for iPad. __________________ Port Wine & Claret \| British Cars \| Welsh Corgi's

10-07-2011, 01:19 PM	#11
357 Will herf for food Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Mike Location: Home is where I park it Posts: 4,075 Trading: (9)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Greg, A friend's father recently was struggling with cancer and it became very difficult for him to move around. They got him a Droid Tablet, and he absolutely loved it. He loved being connected and getting to interact with people. I haven't searched the specifics, but there are less costly hardware platforms than Apple. I'm not trying to play the old MS/Apple game, just pointing out that when on a budget you might want to consider other brands. Mike __________________ “Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar;” Mark Twain

10-07-2011, 04:08 PM	#12
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,725 Trading: (10)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Okay, I am overwhelmed to say the least. I didn't want this to be a moocher please send me money at all. I shoulda known that there would be some of you friends that would do something to help, but my mind is kinda scrambled somewhat since we got the news. I didn't really consider all the implications of posting this, but I shoulda. Secondly to Mac, the input is valued (as it is from everyone here) and I didn't really think it would ever be something I would post publicly on fb, I woulda probably only sent messages to her (our) friends and family. And then there is the fear of getting too much money and then having to return it if that happens. I am now a little mixed up and feeling a little badly for the whole thing. If i had a bunch of cigars I could sell to help the cause so to speak i would do it in a new york minute, but the truth is I haven't purchased very many cigars in the past year and a half. Not that I am in the poor house, we have just been focusing on other things since my wife finally found a job 6 month's ago. I have plenty of cigars though so don't get any other ideas, they were mostly all bombed and gifted to me from all the brothers here. Scott, I don't know what to say to you brother, thanks seems very small, and I am humbled in what you are doing. I am so sorry to hear about your mom, and I guess I am where you were at a short time ago. I am trying to stay positive in my faith and I know God is in control of the situation, the statistics say that only 5% of people that have the kind of cancer mom has is alive at the 5 year mark.

10-07-2011, 10:27 PM	#13
lyle23 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Greg, sorry to hear about this brother. Try to remain strong and do what you can to keep your mother and the rest of your family the same. You have another family here that is here for you brother.

10-08-2011, 05:05 AM	#14
Devanmc Have My Own Room Join Date: Sep 2010 First Name: Devan Location: The Zoo Posts: 1,971 Trading: (40)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts i want to send GG a decent about but i dont know the current donation total of things. who is doing the math? could you please PM me? I also went searching for a discount on an Ipad. I know its pretty laughable but if i order it threw AAFEs(military exchange) i can get 10bucks off one. so 489 for a 16gb wifi Ipad 2. No taxes and free shipping __________________ I spent a lot of my money on booze, cigars, birds and fast cars, the rest I just squandered. -George Best Last edited by Devanmc; 10-08-2011 at 05:16 AM.

10-08-2011, 06:27 AM	#15
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,725 Trading: (10)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Okay guys this went way too fast, and there is enough to buy the ipad. Please don't send anymore, because I really don't want to get more than I need. You guys have been more than generous and i appreciate it from the bottom of my and my families hearts. I know there is cheaper things out there and one of the reasons that I wanted to get her an ipad is because i know a few people who have one and they love it, plus I have an iphone and I am gonna have to teach her how to use it and i wont have to learn a new system to teach her. I will never forget what yall have done to help us. God Bless everyone here for being friends. Thanks for your help Devan, I appreciate it immensely.

10-08-2011, 06:36 AM	#16
Devanmc Have My Own Room Join Date: Sep 2010 First Name: Devan Location: The Zoo Posts: 1,971 Trading: (40)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts hmmmm what is this... __________________ I spent a lot of my money on booze, cigars, birds and fast cars, the rest I just squandered. -George Best

10-08-2011, 02:12 PM	#18
cmitch Heads up get down Join Date: Oct 2010 First Name: Clayton Location: NW Alabama by the river Posts: 2,720 Trading: (25)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts Paying it forward and there's none better to receive than Greg's mom. I wish I could have jumped in on this. Maybe things will be better down the road. __________________ No matter what one's status is in society, cigars are the great equalizer where the affluent and common share a love for the leaf. - Me.

10-08-2011, 06:42 AM	#19
emopunker2004 Central Fla rollin Join Date: Jan 2011 First Name: Justin Location: Winter Springs, FL Posts: 6,171 Trading: (46)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts o snaps __________________ Cigar Asylum: Where all are equal, unless you are from CA, then you are more equal.

10-08-2011, 06:53 AM	#20
Don Fernando Postwhore Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Ferdinand Location: Singapore Posts: 10,068 Trading: (29)	Re: posing a question need some guidance and thoughts if anybody needs that shipping addy for some added ammo ...... ask pnoon, keeper of the rolodex __________________ check out my reviews on my blog.