[NCRadioMan]

Cigarettes are the perverse opposite of cigars: (true)
Cigars are long, cigarettes are short; (not exactly true)
Cigars are dark, cigarettes are white; (true)
Cigars are thick, cigarettes are slim; (not exactly true)
Cigars smell strongly, cigarettes are perfumed; (perfumed? Not to me.)
Cigarettes are for the lips while (lips? lungs more like it)
Cigars are for both mouth and teeth; (teeth? how about the nose)
Cigarettes never go out but burn up quickly, (not true now that cigarette paper is laced with carpet glue so they will go out if unattended)
While cigars seem to last forever; (I wish)
Cigars are big brutes, cigarettes are as feminine as jewels. (somewhat)
Cigarettes are for chain-smoking, (true)
Cigars must be smoked one at a time,
Peaceably, with all the leisure in the world. (true unless you smoke a full culebra)
Cigarettes are of the instant, (true)
Cigars are for eternity. (again, I wish lol)
- Guillermo Cabrera Infante