Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum - The Good Grandpa

A woman in a grocery store happens upon a grandfather and his poorly behaved three year-old grandson. It's obvious to her that Gramps has his hands full with the child screaming for candy in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle, same for fruit, cereal and soda in their respective aisles. Meanwhile, Gramps is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, "Easy, Fred, we won't be long."

Another outburst, and she hears Gramps calmly say, "It's okay, Fred, just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Calm down."

At the checkout, the hell on wheels little boy is throwing items out of the cart, and Gramps again in a controlled voice says, "Fred, Fred, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes. Stay cool, Fred."

Very impressed, the woman goes outside where Gramps is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. "You know, sir, it's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time, you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay. Fred is very lucky to have you as his grandpa."

"Thanks, lady," said Gramps, "But, I'm Fred. The little bastard's name is Steve, and I'm going to beat the crap of him when I get him home."