Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum
Page 4 of 6 « First < 23 4 56 >
Show 50 post(s) from this thread on one page

Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/index.php)
-   Jokes (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/forumdisplay.php?f=59)
-   -   Smitty81 roast. (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showthread.php?t=53861)

replicant_argent 03-01-2012 04:57 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Smitty uses the search function like Lisa Lampanelli uses discretion about whether she screws 4 or 5 guys a night.

T.G 03-01-2012 05:00 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by icehog3 (Post 1577698)
If the next post doesn't include an insult for smitty, I am shuttin' 'er down.
If it's a compliment, does he get banned?

Bageland2000 03-01-2012 05:03 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by replicant_argent (Post 1577703)
I once thought about asking Smitty for advice, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
My cousin's out fighting dragons, and what do I get? Douche-bag duty at the smitty roast...

replicant_argent 03-01-2012 05:04 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I was at a pet store once, and saw a puppy that was the product of love between Lisa Lampanelli and Smitty. I thought about buying it and calling it Smitty Jr. but I decided "CumDumpster" was a lot classier.
I didn't buy it, I rammed a cat down its throat to put it out of its inevitable misery.

Pseudosacred 03-01-2012 05:05 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
So much animosity towards this guy :r

I'm not sure if he deserves it or not?

Islayphile 03-01-2012 05:07 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Animosity is such a strong word

Hatred will suffice

smitty81 03-01-2012 05:09 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by icehog3 (Post 1577662)
This is a roast thread.

If people don't start insulting smitty immediately, the ToE will have no option but to close this thread.

I will also post a new thread with a poll for members' opinions on banning smitty.
Ban me? really?

replicant_argent 03-01-2012 05:09 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Don't get me wrong, Smitty is a classy guy!

I once saw him use a New rubber on a 2 dollar syphilitic hooker.



Don't ask me why I was there, it was rock bottom for me.

Islayphile 03-01-2012 05:11 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by replicant_argent (Post 1577721)
Don't get me wrong, Smitty is a classy guy!

I once saw him use a New rubber on a 2 dollar syphilitic hooker.



Don't ask me why I was there, it was rock bottom for me.
Even though we don't want to know, we gotta know

Bageland2000 03-01-2012 05:13 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pseudosacred (Post 1577711)
So much animosity towards this guy :r

I'm not sure if he deserves it or not?
He created the thread...

Bageland2000 03-01-2012 05:14 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by smitty81 (Post 1577719)
Ban me? really?
I'd miss you less than I miss dick cancer

replicant_argent 03-01-2012 05:15 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
This one time, at Band Camp, I heard Smitty shoved a bassoon.....

jluck 03-01-2012 05:23 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Smitty couldn't even buy respect with mass bombings at this point.

smitty81 03-01-2012 05:26 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jluck (Post 1577734)
Smitty couldn't even buy respect with mass bombings at this point.
Wow. a good one

chippewastud79 03-01-2012 05:27 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jluck (Post 1577734)
Smitty couldn't even buy respect with mass bombings at this point.
Nobody can 'buy respect with mass bombings'. :rolleyes:

Pseudosacred 03-01-2012 05:28 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I just realized, Smitty has 323 posts in a month. Wow! I wish I had that much to say :r

jluck 03-01-2012 05:29 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by chippewastud79 (Post 1577739)
Nobody can 'buy respect with mass bombings'. :rolleyes:
That was the joke.

chippewastud79 03-01-2012 05:31 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jluck (Post 1577745)
That was the joke.
Just wanted to make sure you weren't encouraging him to try. ;)

chippewastud79 03-01-2012 05:32 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pseudosacred (Post 1577741)
I just realized, Smitty has 323 posts in a month. Wow! I wish I had that much to say :r
So does Smitty. ;)

Ogre 03-01-2012 05:33 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
You know that Smitty created the tooth brush??? If it had been anyone else, it would have been called the teeth brush.

Bageland2000 03-01-2012 05:34 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by chippewastud79 (Post 1577748)
So does Smitty. ;)
burn!:r

jluck 03-01-2012 05:35 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by chippewastud79 (Post 1577747)
Just wanted to make sure you weren't encouraging him to try. ;)
No sir. That kills the genuine part of bombing as I understand it.

bobarian 03-01-2012 05:39 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jluck (Post 1577754)
No sir. That kills the genuine part of bombing as I understand it.
;s All it kills is the "Look at Me!" trend that seems to pervade many recent bombings. sh

maninblack 03-01-2012 05:39 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Ban him? I hardly knew him! On a serious note, my belly button smells like nacho cheese.

CigarNut 03-01-2012 05:59 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I tried to think of something good to say about Smitty… Nothing came to mind...

:r

chippewastud79 03-01-2012 06:03 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobarian (Post 1577761)
;s All it kills is the "Look at Me!" trend that seems to pervade many recent bombings. sh
Ahh, yes. Look at me 'Bomb' posts kind of like 'Look at me' Banter threads. :gary

sevans105 03-01-2012 06:39 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Man, I'm kinda jealous. I dont have 9 pages on my banter thread. :(

I guess even negative attention counts as attention.

maninblack 03-01-2012 06:50 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
This isnt banter Scott, it's about how smitty's a joke. I think.

icehog3 03-01-2012 07:02 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Now THIS is a roast! :D

Ogre 03-01-2012 07:10 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I wonder if Smitty can hold his liquor. Is seems that the attention whores are more talk then action!! Is that not right Tom???:r:r

maninblack 03-01-2012 07:11 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
We haven't been near mean enough yet. Let's bring the pain.

CigarSquid 03-01-2012 07:31 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Islayphile (Post 1577500)
It's customary for the "roastee" to give out free Gurkha's to all who ask.
Dont forget mine.

Quote:
Originally Posted by jluck (Post 1577734)
Smitty couldn't even buy respect with mass bombings at this point.
Harsh. Oh Well, Roast on!

Quote:
Originally Posted by chippewastud79 (Post 1577739)
Nobody can 'buy respect with mass bombings'. :rolleyes:
:gary

Quote:
Originally Posted by maninblack (Post 1577902)
We haven't been near mean enough yet. Let's bring the pain.
I really cant get anything to bring the pain out. ;s for my lack of roasting.

icehog3 03-01-2012 07:50 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ogre (Post 1577901)
I wonder if Smitty can hold his liquor. Is seems that the attention whores are more talk then action!! Is that not right Tom???:r:r
I've seen one or two over the years, Larry. ;) :lr

cort 03-01-2012 08:48 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Does anyone know how long it takes for fingernails to grow back? It hurts to type.

Jbailey 03-01-2012 09:02 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by icehog3 (Post 1577956)
I've seen one or two over the years, Larry. ;) :lr
:r:r:r

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:04 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by cort (Post 1578009)
Does anyone know how long it takes for fingernails to grow back? It hurts to type.
Everyone's fingernails are different, you have to see what works for you.

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:08 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578102)
Everyone's fingernails are different, you have to see what works for you.
Lee Press-ons?

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:10 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Is Lee a brand of press-ons?

Boz 03-01-2012 10:12 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by cort (Post 1578009)
Does anyone know how long it takes for fingernails to grow back? It hurts to type.
Stop gripping the handicap rail in the stall so hard.

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:13 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578118)
Is Lee a brand of press-ons?
http://www.skooldays.com/categories/fashion/fa1555.htm

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:16 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
How do you press those on?

CigarNut 03-01-2012 10:19 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Just go for the gel coat; my wife says that they last for months.

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:20 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578128)
How do you press those on?
http://iamtransgendered.com/ILovePressOnNails.aspx

Paragraph 6.

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:25 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I know how to press those on, I'm not an idiot don't be such a d!ck about it gosh!

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:27 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578144)
I know how to press those on, I'm not an idiot don't be such a d!ck about it gosh!
Dick? Really?

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:27 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Also, that website is hilarious.

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:30 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
I try to be a good boy and make the I in dick into a !

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:31 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578152)
I try to be a good boy and make the I in dick into a !
But I answered your question and I am a dick? :confused:

oooo35980 03-01-2012 10:33 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by icehog3 (Post 1578155)
But I answered your question and I am a dick? :confused:
DUH...

icehog3 03-01-2012 10:34 PM
Re: Smitty81 roast.
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by oooo35980 (Post 1578161)
DUH...
Well, Wecome to the Asylum.


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 11:31 PM.
Page 4 of 6 « First < 23 4 56 >
Show 50 post(s) from this thread on one page

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.