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Pour wine from the decanter

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and make love to the little garden gnome.

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Once, while taking a walk,

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I came upon a frog who could talk!

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He said "Howdy do",

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pass me the booze

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in a voice like Peter Falk. :D

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I had a dream about Halle Berry...

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You might guess that it couldn't be scary.

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We were walking together...

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Two birds of a feather...

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When she told me, "I'm ready to marry!"

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I knew an old sailor from Portsmouth,

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who wished for a lass to cavort with

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There was one on the dock,

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(too easy....pass)

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as homely as a rock...

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Time out !

:r :r :r

You guys rock!

Time in!

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To lift her, he'd need a forklift! :D

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New one:

With the Asylum's 2-year Anniversary near...

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Mailboxes have something to fear!


(p.s. I've lol'd in this thread a lot...this is great!)

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For its all bombs away

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And your pleas have no sway

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With ring-leaders like Dave, Kelly, Peter, Tom, and Týr!

(Apologies to the rest of the Team of Eleven... y'all are equally feared!) :D

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New one:

I'm up late and not ready for sleep...

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to the kitchen, I think I might creep.

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Grabbed a beer and a sandwhich...

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And with plenty of bandwidth,

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had refueled my next logical leap.

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I was winning a race at Le Mans,

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being chased by a dog named Hanz....

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so I put it on cruise

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Started hitting the booze,

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And my car ended up in the ponds.

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Next...

There are times I don't know chit

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but I just don't know when to quit,

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though I think I may be

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I'm not what you can see

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I am really just a twit

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New:

The years just keep getting shorter

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So I think I will run for the border,

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with my humidor in tow,

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My anticipation did grow,

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Lit one up, but the smoke nazis made me abort her

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If I were you, I'd like to try...

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a Cuban stogie before I die

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They say you can tell by the distinctive "twang"...

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And all those flavors that Cubans brang,

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=brang

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But a Cohibo will make you cry

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My lighter's dry, my cutter's broken...